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phenix5589

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phenix5589

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 September 1990 (24 years)
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  • Number of visits : 76
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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phenix5589's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27103) - you deserved it (2841)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to pay. She then turned to the Barista and said, "He's never had a girlfriend before, and I wanted to show him that they take your money." The Barista laughed so hard she had to excuse herself. FML

#19603666
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21576) - you deserved it (1917)

On 05/10/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by brannonjames - United States

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23972) - you deserved it (2695)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML

#19522939
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23074) - you deserved it (17329)

On 04/24/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by Jaclk - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realised my girlfriend is the perfect woman for most men. She only ever talks to me in the intermissions on Modern Warfare 2; shame it's not me playing. FML

#8614078
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24064) - you deserved it (5645)

On 02/24/2010 at 12:27pm - love - by sadf4x0r (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

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