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pflahert

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pflahert

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  • Number of visits : 1276
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pflahert's page activity

Visits<b>Tempest151</b> - the 05/03/2013 at 12:33pm

pflahert's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

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pflahert's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my husband has been coming home from work so late. Turns out he loves to help people. Specifically female people. And by help, I mean sleep with. FML

#21403935
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23522) - you deserved it (1816)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:49pm - intimacy - by I pick em' good - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML

#21403711
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24151) - you deserved it (2201)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

#21403035
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17119) - you deserved it (19688)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm - work - by RavingLunatic (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boss told me I ask too many questions and that's why they cut my hours in half. Officially, I'm a "Pharmacy Technician in Training", which means I'm trying to teach myself how to do the job without killing someone. All from on the job experience and an outdated textbook. FML

#21402730
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25742) - you deserved it (2190)

On 05/01/2015 at 2:12am - work - by PharmSlave (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at my house party, I caught my boyfriend having sex with my best friend. His excuse? He wanted to be better in bed for me. FML

#21402521
103 comments

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32062) - you deserved it (4443)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom told me that if I wanted to commit suicide, I should make it seem like a car accident, and not do it in the house, because she would be too embarrassed if people thought she was a bad parent. FML

#21401085
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35024) - you deserved it (2606)

On 04/28/2015 at 9:26am - misc - by WasNotAdopted (man) - United States (California)

Today, during my shift at work, I started to feel really sick and started throwing up. While I had my head in a bag, I had several customers ask me for directions and another customer abuse me for my lack of service. FML

#21400980
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26982) - you deserved it (2062)

On 04/28/2015 at 1:24am - health - by vomitgirl - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my fiancé called me 'thick' for not realising he'd been sleeping with his ex earlier. FML

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37190) - you deserved it (2758)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I orgasmed in front of someone for the first time. Too bad it was my dad who didn't knock before coming in. FML

#21399489
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32277) - you deserved it (5125)

On 04/25/2015 at 1:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30360) - you deserved it (2463)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML

#21399347
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33561) - you deserved it (1955)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)



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