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peytonkins12

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peytonkins12

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1421
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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peytonkins12's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML

#13403987
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28568) - you deserved it (8980)

On 10/11/2010 at 6:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was tidying my room when my gran came in and offered to help. I said I didn't need any, but she started going through it anyway. She found a tube of "Very Cherry" lube and asked what it was. I subtly tore off the label and tried to convince her it was a face mask. She's taken it to try it out tonight. FML

#13394312
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24406) - you deserved it (8115)

On 10/10/2010 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Dilly - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was watching a movie. The ending was sad and I started bawling my eyes out. My boyfriend sitting beside me kept looking back and forth between me and the TV, so I asked what he was doing. He replied with, 'I don't know which one is better to watch.' FML

#13376999
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14399) - you deserved it (23197)

On 10/09/2010 at 10:36am - love - by Kiimmy (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was in the elevator with my new boss. He asked things like "How are you?" "How's your day going?" and "What's for dinner?" I answered everything and tried to make small talk. I then noticed that he was wearing a bluetooth and was talking to someone else. FML

#13375459
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28865) - you deserved it (6544)

On 10/09/2010 at 5:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after weeks of thinking and playing every outcome possible in my head, I told my parents I'm gay. My dad nodded and didn't even look up from his book; my mom told me to go to the doctor if it starts to itch. FML

#13374619
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33040) - you deserved it (8156)

On 10/09/2010 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29838) - you deserved it (8949)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, after me and my boyfriend had pretty much amazing sex, he took off the condom and started swinging it back and forth, all while making the sounds of a clock and saying, "You are getting sleepy." FML

#13363773
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27433) - you deserved it (6143)

On 10/08/2010 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after bringing my dog back inside, he started whining. I thought it was because he wanted his toys, but he was really trying to say, "Help me," as a torpedo of diarrhea exploded out of him, leaving a trail down the hallway. FML

#13342166
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25924) - you deserved it (4473)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:01pm - animals - by ukfan - United States

Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML

#13318955
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70009) - you deserved it (7880)

On 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML

#13318955
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70009) - you deserved it (7880)

On 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was visiting my boyfriend, who lives 2 hours away. After about twenty minutes of glorious sex, he told me in no uncertain terms that he was about to come. He then "baaa"d like a sheep as he came. I couldn't come after that. FML

#13291298
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27227) - you deserved it (3860)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:31pm - intimacy - by seriously (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my husband modeling my cute floral panties. All he could manage to say was "I love you." FML

#13274017
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27431) - you deserved it (4289)

On 10/01/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by canispankthat - United States (California)

Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML

#13273725
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40604) - you deserved it (4492)

On 10/01/2010 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked past two guys on the street. I heard one of them whisper, "Jeez, that girl looks like Donald Trump." FML

#13268131
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23680) - you deserved it (3409)

On 09/30/2010 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML

#13245157
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16842) - you deserved it (38771)

On 09/29/2010 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Claire (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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