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peytonkins12

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peytonkins12

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1333
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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peytonkins12's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21529) - you deserved it (37934)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML

#16445488
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49686) - you deserved it (13411)

On 06/01/2011 at 12:28am - misc - by nofriends - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

#16418676
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33093) - you deserved it (15016)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:14pm - misc - by OopsKid (man) - France

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60044) - you deserved it (12567)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36303) - you deserved it (5988)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26125) - you deserved it (14055)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32820) - you deserved it (20217)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my girlfriend asked if we could spice up our sex life. She didn't think it was too funny when I laid out all of our spices on the bed. She now refuses to have sex. FML

#16200408
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20213) - you deserved it (60812)

On 05/16/2011 at 1:40am - intimacy - by phoenix101 -

Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML

#16114978
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37294) - you deserved it (11113)

On 05/10/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by Dana (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I discovered that my new boyfriend is the type of guy who, when there is a conflict, will just scream "I LOVE YOU" over and over hoping that it will solve itself instead of actually trying to work the problem out. FML

#16055177
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36349) - you deserved it (7206)

On 05/05/2011 at 10:40am - love - by sad (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML

#15817034
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42340) - you deserved it (8251)

On 04/17/2011 at 1:56am - intimacy - by rastafarimon (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got hurt and spent the remainder of the day limping. I wish I could say it was from something badass like roller derby, but I can't. A woman with a rolling cart filled with packs of Pepsi rolled over my foot on the bus. FML

#15809237
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23204) - you deserved it (3647)

On 04/16/2011 at 3:18pm - health - by pepsifoot - United States (Oregon)

Today, is my birthday. Everyone forgot except my stalker. He rang the door bell the second it turned 12:00. FML

#15693187
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41514) - you deserved it (3529)

On 04/08/2011 at 11:03am - love - by hopeless -

Today, my girlfriend called me and asked what I was doing. I replied, "What I'm always doing." She couldn't think of anything besides eating. FML

#15621344
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11921) - you deserved it (29241)

On 04/03/2011 at 1:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32120) - you deserved it (6493)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)



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