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Offline (the 10/08/2016 at 7:56pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3560
  • Number of comments : 183
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About pete9913 : I read these FMLs to get a laugh. At least I know I don't have it as bad as I think sometimes. I also usually come here on my phone, so sometimes I click on a YDI or FYL that I didn't mean to. I'm retired military, after 23 years, and I'd still be in if they'd let me. love to spend my spare time outside, hiking, fishing or just laying in my hammock.

pete9913's page activity

Visits<b>2simz</b> - the 10/30/2016 at 2:31pm<b>rengoonhoo</b> - the 10/15/2016 at 7:11pm<b>PopTarts513</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 11:44pm<b>mareike</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 4:43am<b>BlueAlpaca</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 8:26pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 2:57pm<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 11:47am<b>DukeTyler</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 12:17am<b>Jesmassimo</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 3:59pm<b>dariella</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 1:55am<b>rae_siah_3x</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 9:48am<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 3:01pm<b>amayraniescobar</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 8:29pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 2:13pm<b>mas12806</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:46am<b>its808time</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 8:55am<b>slappygecko</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 12:40pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 12:25pm

Fucked!<b>BlueAlpaca</b> - the 09/30/2016 at 2:25am<b>emi_alejandra</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 3:17am<b>missa8604</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 9:56pm<b>gatorclay97</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 1:43pm<b>jupiterdjay</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 7:36am<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 3:29pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:23pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 1:07am<b>llexibearr</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 6:30pm<b>balnuaimi</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 3:30am<b>Anais457</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 6:42pm<b>aprilnb1</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 2:19pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 10:12am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 10:34pm<b>spicypie</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 4:17am<b>melisssa87</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 11:47pm<b>zAstonish</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 6:46am<b>StupidUsername89</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 4:51am

pete9913's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of pete9913's badges

pete9913's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to take some local college courses to improve my résumé. I got into the physics room and a large, multi-colored sign in large print stated, "NO THROWING OR STABBING." FML

by Evjoel / 09/12/2016 at 6:52am / Bermuda (Hamilton) / Work

Today, I woke up and found a turd casually sitting in the bathroom sink. Just 9 more months left on this lease. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2016 at 1:17pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to clean our apartment, and then we went out to grab a bite to eat. When we returned, I found a baby's sock in the middle of the floor. Neither of us have a baby, and nobody we know does either. Now I'm just waiting for the doll-themed nightmares tonight. FML

by Squeepy / 04/09/2016 at 11:45pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, the cut on my face from getting hit with a baseball healed. It's left a dick-shaped scar. FML

by dickface / 03/31/2016 at 9:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2016 at 7:53am / United Kingdom (Merton) / Love

Today, I got call from the manager for a company I applied for. Turns out, he mixed up my friend's phone number with mine, since we applied on the same day, so the manager accidentally hired her instead of me. He said the position is still mine if I want it, but they will have to let her go. FML

by speaknoevil1 / 01/29/2016 at 1:03am / United States (Florida) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my parents installed spyware on my computer after reading an article about teens ordering drugs from the deep web. Now I'm too afraid to watch porn because I don't want my parents to know when I'm jacking off. FML

by AustinFFA / 01/22/2016 at 11:46am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while working at a gas station, I accidentally changed the price of gas to 8.9 cents per litre. It took me fifteen minutes to figure out why everyone wanted only two or three dollars of gas. I fixed it, but now my managers are debating charging me for lost revenue. FML

by Ihadnoidea / 12/12/2015 at 2:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my six-year-old son told me how it was funny that there's "a food chicken and an animal chicken". That's going to be a fun one to explain to him. FML

by sydcaller618 / 11/23/2015 at 10:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids

Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML

by qourt / 10/29/2015 at 11:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my son told me that he doesn't need to go to school because he doesn't need a job. It turns out he plans to get a life sentence in prison and live the rest of his life at the taxpayers' expense. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 12:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, in the middle of a presentation, I fought a shart, but the shart won. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2015 at 11:10am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I wrote my boyfriend a love letter during class and told him to read it when he got home. He texted me later asking me why I gave him my school assignment. I must have handed the love letter in to my teacher. FML

by helpme / 09/25/2015 at 9:46am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Love

Today, my daughter's 14-year-old boyfriend confessed, in front of her, that he only went out with her so he might have a chance to date me. My daughter isn't speaking to me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2015 at 5:54pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Love

Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2015 at 11:23am / Work