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pete9913

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pete9913

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1077
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About pete9913 : I read these FMLs to get a laugh. At least I know I don't have it as bad as I think sometimes. I also usually come here on my phone, so sometimes I click on a YDI or FYL that I didn't mean to.

pete9913's page activity

Visits<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - yesterday at 5:48pm<b>StupidUsername89</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:51pm<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 9:57pm<b>jfreeman86</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 2:10am<b>Ley135</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:58pm<b>sarika</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:20pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 1:52pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:36pm<b>brittanyrose329</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 5:59pm<b>hipposteve</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 11:01am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 10:12am<b>mcore</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:20am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 2:22am<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:40pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:48pm<b>looking4funny</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:52pm<b>amileah13</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:50pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:51pm

Fucked!<b>StupidUsername89</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 4:51am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 8:22am<b>amileah13</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 5:50am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:54am<b>kittina</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:19pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 2:16pm<b>kristameyer2</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 2:27am<b>heirofhope</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 3:55am

pete9913's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of pete9913's badges

pete9913's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, the professor I've had a crush on informed me that there's only one way left I could still pass his course. Thinking this was an attempt to flirt with me, I told him I'd do anything he could imagine. He then looked confused when he asked me to write an essay. FML

#21458908
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9822) - you deserved it (29256)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by notwhatithought (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, it's been a week since I started farting in my sleep for no apparent reason. It's so frequent and so foul-smelling that my husband and I are both losing sleep and are having to take afternoon naps to make up for it. FML

#21457512
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18574) - you deserved it (2178)

On 08/18/2015 at 6:59am - misc - by Fartnonymous (woman) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, it's been 2 days since my boyfriend "accidentally" slipped into the wrong hole while continuing to hammer me at full speed. I still can't poop or even walk right. FML

#21456278
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29109) - you deserved it (3558)

On 08/15/2015 at 5:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learnt the meaning of the phrase "ménage à trois". I had always thought it was synonymous with "fiasco" and have used it several times in essays. FML

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina is "as clean as a dog's mouth." I'm not sure if that supposed to be a compliment or not. FML

#21450713
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (2570)

On 08/02/2015 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a revolving door got the better of me. I made it into the crowded lobby, unlike my skirt. Bad day to wear a thong. FML

#21448563
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26766) - you deserved it (3248)

On 07/28/2015 at 1:18pm - misc - by Oopsie - United States (Vermont)

Today, it was my first day working at a library. I expected it to be fun and peaceful, not to end up having to call the cops on a guy who started jerking off into a book. FML

#21446464
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25175) - you deserved it (1564)

On 07/24/2015 at 10:02am - work - by fishingforubies2 - Aruba

Today, for some reason entirely beyond my knowledge, Siri referred to me as "Sugartits". FML

#21444204
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22503) - you deserved it (2877)

On 07/19/2015 at 9:23pm - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

#21443162
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26487) - you deserved it (3212)

On 07/17/2015 at 7:04pm - misc - by AK-47 (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33716) - you deserved it (2466)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat thought it was appropriate to bring a bird into the house at 4am; the bird thought it was appropriate to attack my mom. FML

#21440806
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22980) - you deserved it (2275)

On 07/13/2015 at 12:39am - animals - by 4am blues - United States (Florida)

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

#21438347
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22953) - you deserved it (3931)

On 07/08/2015 at 3:04am - animals - by coolcat10156 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31785) - you deserved it (2304)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML

#21432306
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15897) - you deserved it (20968)

On 06/26/2015 at 12:54pm - work - by AshWil - United States (District of Columbia)



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