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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18086) - you deserved it (2859)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)
Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9301) - you deserved it (39395)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)
Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25595) - you deserved it (6064)
On 07/25/2011 at 3:21am - health - by jgdgjyfg - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, I realized that the guy I've been sending anonymous, dirty emails to knows who I am. My signature, which includes my full name, was automatically added to the end of every email. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3093) - you deserved it (23358)
On 07/22/2011 at 9:10pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was discussing the traffic with my brother. He said the most common car colour is red. I said it was black. We ended up betting €100 on which three vehicles of either colour would pass by our house first. It seems a convoy of fire trucks had somewhere to be in a hurry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22625) - you deserved it (7625) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, at work, our team started a new sales strategy of selling flowers to men by asking them to buy one for their lovely ladies. The first guy I ask ends up crying and telling me his wife passed away a week ago. The woman with him was actually his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23337) - you deserved it (3224)
On 07/17/2011 at 1:16am - work - by Auston (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9992) - you deserved it (34275)
On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)
Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74242) - you deserved it (6623)
On 06/06/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by KillMeNow (woman) - United States (California)
I agree, your life sucks (33255) - you deserved it (6441)
On 06/05/2011 at 2:48am - intimacy - by e_edge (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my family went and visited my nan. She ushered me in close and asked, "When are you going to knock it off with all this emo cockshite?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10491) - you deserved it (30581)
On 06/04/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by Flarewolf (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my aunt gave my cat aspirin because when she touched his nose he had a 'fever'. I came home to a dead cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43884) - you deserved it (2626)
On 06/04/2011 at 7:22am - animals - by Clumsyblonde22 - United States
Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36220) - you deserved it (2441)
On 06/04/2011 at 2:15am - work - by zain - United States (Texas)
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend in a crowded mall. I thought this was a good idea, until she went ballistic, began screaming and crying, and then stabbed me in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. I got banned from the mall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16862) - you deserved it (34394)
On 05/30/2011 at 12:29am - love - by kingpin9219 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I puked up a centipede. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42481) - you deserved it (5474)
On 05/11/2011 at 12:59am - health - by vaalcrawford - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I confided to my dad that since the recent breakup with my boyfriend of 3 months, I feel down all the time and life doesn't feel worth living anymore. His loving advice was for me to "grow the fuck up and get your sentimental head out of la-la land." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15551) - you deserved it (49135)
On 05/08/2011 at 3:21pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
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