December 14, 2009 -- Today, my old company was acquired by a new one. These guys are smart enough to block FML. I won't be able to FML during the work day. FML.
Today, my roommate confronted me about my eating disorder. She described in length how emaciated-looking my chest has become and how she only wants to help. Except that I don't have an eating disorder. My sternum is deformed and I have only recently become confident enough to wear low-cut tops. FML
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On 03/09/2010 at 3:57am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML
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On 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm - misc - by SadFace (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my boss was using my computer and tried to copy and paste a website URL. It must not have copied first, because it pasted a URL to a porn site. I think I should start looking for a new job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2753) - you totally deserved it (17425)
On 03/01/2010 at 3:50pm - work - by themanontheright - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was very sick, and my boyfriend was taking care of me at his parents' house. I was laying on the couch, innocently watching a movie while he rubbed my feet, when his stepmother came home from work. She freaked out, accused us of having it off on her couch, and kicked me out. FML
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On 02/24/2010 at 9:18am - misc - by Greymoya (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14014) - you totally deserved it (1578)
On 02/22/2010 at 4:43pm - health - by baconrash - United States (New York)
Today, after being dumped just 48 hours prior, I awoke from a night of passionate lovemaking with my ex. Last night, he came to my house, romanced me, and presented a possible future. This morning, when I got up to use the restroom, my laptop, money, and ex-boyfriend were gone. FML
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On 02/20/2010 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Ennui (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, it snowed in South Carolina for the first time in 10 years. It snowed eight whole inches! I was so excited, I yelled for my kids and ran outside to build a snowman. I ran out to the steps and slipped on ice. I woke up in the hospital with a bad concussion. The snow had all melted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15715) - you totally deserved it (2585)
On 02/13/2010 at 3:11pm - kids - by owwie - United States
Today, I am meeting my boyfriend's very conservative parents for the first time, so I decided to dress appropriately and curl my hair to match. In so doing, I accidentally touched the iron to my neck, and now I have a burn there that closely resembles a hickey. FML
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On 02/04/2010 at 1:28pm - love - by Minabee (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He is also rich and successful, and would probably be perfect for me, if only he could stop bragging about it. FML
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On 01/26/2010 at 6:30am - love - by OTZ - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I started work as the head engineer for a big civil engineering project. I met the rest of my team, in particular the environmental engineer who I'll need to get along with the most. As it turns out, I took her virginity when we were freshmen in college. She still thinks I'm an asshole. FML
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On 01/25/2010 at 8:32am - love - by CivE (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML
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On 01/02/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by xxxzzzooo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, it is New Year's Day. While all of my friends are out partying, I stayed home and mastered level 34 on FarmVille. FML
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On 01/01/2010 at 3:16am - misc - by thatsjustlovely (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at work, I was forced to listen to the Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers Christmas album on repeat for 8 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22768) - you totally deserved it (2327)
On 12/02/2009 at 2:14am - work - by makeitstop - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend "You're kidding, right?" FML
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On 11/04/2009 at 1:51am - love - by BlackCheetah101 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today I was at a party and saw an old friend from college. I went up to her asking how she was and how her family was. She went on to tell me that her husband left her a month ago and started crying. I told her that he was an ass anyway and that she didn't need him. Turns out he died. FML
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On 11/01/2009 at 8:43pm - misc - by Oops (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
