peppermintbutler

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peppermintbutler

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 17 September 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 438
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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peppermintbutler's favorite FMLs

Today, my asshole of a roommate finally decided to move out. Not only did he take his belongings with him, he took some of mine as well. Including my dog. FML

by busybuzzybee / 08/16/2011 at 8:31pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML

by kindgartin / 04/23/2011 at 5:26am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Kids

Today, we were going to Disney World all the way from North Carolina. After 12 hours of driving, my kids started fighting and complaining. My husband finally said, "If I hear you guys one more time we're turning around and going back home." They annoyed him once again, and we actually went home. FML

by jaimie / 03/19/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, a little boy called me on the phone, crying "grandma died" in a broken voice. I just didn't have the heart to say "wrong number." FML

by Waffle / 03/09/2011 at 10:47am / Kids

Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2011 at 2:29am / United States (Utah) / Kids

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

by fmlalways / 01/22/2011 at 8:00am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 12:20am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 12:02am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML

by Cherie / 12/07/2010 at 1:25pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my aunt asked me to babysit my cousin. She gave me a warning that he says he's allergic to foods to get out of eating them. When I brought out my homemade cooking, he told me he was allergic, so I made him eat it anyway. Turns out he WAS allergic. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2010 at 1:06pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I came home from vacation to discover that one of my friends had broken into my house, painted my room a hideous color, ruined my hardwood floors with the paint, and left huge mess for me to clean. When I confronted her about it, she called me ungrateful. Everyone I know agrees with her. FML

Today, I caught my dad squishing my stick-on bra cups in his hands, trying to figure out what they are. He's an engineer who graduated from MIT. I still don't think he knows what they are. FML

by Kegronauer / 08/23/2009 at 5:35pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML

by expen_dable / 07/06/2009 at 1:55am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy