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pennyprostitute

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pennyprostitute

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 216
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About pennyprostitute : I love to sleep in late and I'm also quite sarcastic. Don't worry, I'm not actually a hooker! My cousin dared me to put this as a username. So here I am!

Quick facts:
•I love "How i Met Your Mother"
•I love to rant
•I'm a little bit of a feminist
•I'm in lots of fandoms
•I try to be funny but my jokes are too complicated for your stupid human minds

Well, that's it if you stuck around to read this. Thanks!

pennyprostitute's page activity

Visits<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:32pm<b>ThatOneGuy719</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:57am<b>Victormoon</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 2:41pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 11:52pm<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 11:09pm<b>spignona84</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 10:30pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 2:52am<b>WEREuMADbro</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 2:11pm<b>Thorvald22</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 1:48am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 5:01pm

pennyprostitute's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of pennyprostitute's badges

pennyprostitute's favorite FMLs

Today, a crazy woman grabbed my hair and mentioned how lovely it was. She then asked when I would donate it. I told her I didn't want to, at which point she started yelling that she was going to get some scissors and cut it all off to teach me a lesson. FML

#21090883
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43125) - you deserved it (3453)

On 03/19/2014 at 2:14pm - misc - by donttouchmyhair (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (4555)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52999) - you deserved it (2928)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

#20841540
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57650) - you deserved it (6708)

On 08/17/2013 at 10:18am - love - by why - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a child was choking in the store I work at. He was alone in the aisle, so I started the Heimlich without his parents' permission. After dislodging what was caught, his mother turned the corner and went screaming to my manager for touching her kid. I got a write up. FML

#20839746
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51627) - you deserved it (3003)

On 08/16/2013 at 1:02am - kids - by justwantingtohelp - United States (Michigan)

Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML

#20838741
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50158) - you deserved it (3043)

On 08/15/2013 at 1:39pm - health - by Anonymous - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, my dad, under threats of disowning me, insisted that I offer my sister a job in my company. I run my own law firm, she is a hairdresser. FML

#20838513
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49142) - you deserved it (3136)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:34am - work - by lawman (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I went to a store. I was wearing a shirt that I'd bought from the very same store, and was accused of stealing. When I tried explaining, the manager said I was lying because I'm a teenager and "all teenagers are full of shit." FML

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

#20837089
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55156) - you deserved it (5026)

On 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm - misc - by NewBride (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

#20836995
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63551) - you deserved it (8100)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

#20836449
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49798) - you deserved it (6110)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

#20835170
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47905) - you deserved it (3788) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2013 at 4:49am - kids - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, while at a concert, my boyfriend got mad and jealous because I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49263) - you deserved it (6211)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States

Today, my teacher told the class that we had better like the people at our table because we would all be working together for the final group assessment. Everyone looked at me, stood up, and moved. FML

#20834922
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44684) - you deserved it (7361)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:36am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was diagnosed with severe nut allergies. My dad decided to buy jars of Nutella, write "You know you want this" on them, and stick them around the house. FML

#20833620
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47318) - you deserved it (3209)

On 08/12/2013 at 11:24am - health - by nutfreak (man) - United States (Maryland)



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