Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

pencilmustache

Search for a member

pencilmustache

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25747
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

pencilmustache's page activity

Visits<b>GenH2105</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:28am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 1:31pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:28pm<b>BlockOfRedStone</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 6:31am<b>Dubiousaurus</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:33pm<b>PsychoticAsylum</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:23am<b>fobgirl10171</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 8:01pm<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 4:24am<b>facelick</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 9:33pm<b>oceancandy24</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 2:02am<b>VeroRose</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:32pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:53am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 6:50am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 11:14pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 4:53pm<b>mohamahad</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 5:26pm<b>Gift_of_humor</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:25am<b>rob02</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 4:28am

pencilmustache's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

pencilmustache's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend dumped me and left me with the responsibility of the turtle that I never wanted but she insisted we buy "together." A little bit of research has revealed that Andre will live for "at least 30 years." FML

#2911637
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43435) - you deserved it (6612)

On 06/15/2009 at 1:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my grandpa died. I decided to call my grandma to make sure she was going to be fine. After talking over the phone for 30 minutes or so, I told her goodbye and said, out of habit: "Say hi to grandpa for me". FML

#2901718
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45834) - you deserved it (23312)

On 06/15/2009 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns $10,000 more than me. FML

#2798980
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58774) - you deserved it (3027)

On 06/11/2009 at 11:21am - work - by girlfriday (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was helping a couple come up with a name for the baby they just had. I suggested "Joshua" thinking that it was an okay name. All sudden, the room got quiet. Turns out I had forgotten that Joshua was the name of their 3 year old son who had died a couple months before. FML

#2798038
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32063) - you deserved it (79484)

On 06/11/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by 8reth72 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

#2796637
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78742) - you deserved it (22074)

On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided that I was going to get my front license plate put back on my car after two years of having it off. In these two years I somehow never got pulled over for it, as it is illegal to drive without one in MD. On my way there, I got pulled over for not having a front license plate. FML

#2772100
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15364) - you deserved it (46472)

On 06/10/2009 at 1:47pm - misc - by dm206 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I checked facebook, only to find out that my close cousin is now married. When I looked at the pictures, I saw that my whole family was there - including my sister, mother and father. I was the only one who wasn't invited. FML

#2771745
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63297) - you deserved it (3879)

On 06/10/2009 at 1:35pm - misc - by Oh_baby (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my mom paid my best friend $20 to be my friend when we were 10. FML

#2699534
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (128058) - you deserved it (7045)

On 06/07/2009 at 7:15pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, was teacher appreciation day at my school. They played a slideshow of all the teachers. The students cheered wildly for every teacher. When my picture came up, nobody clapped. The whole room was quiet. FML

#2693631
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53770) - you deserved it (24280)

On 06/07/2009 at 3:21pm - kids - by Ignatius (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting a little boy. I opened up a new bottle of bubbles and it was all goopy and gross so I said "Eww!". The boy then asks, "What's "ew" mean?". I replied with, "Something gross and yucky". Then he pointed at my face and say "Ew! Ew! Ewwww!". FML

#2658966
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50452) - you deserved it (8088)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:23pm - kids - by EwFace (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at work my arms were full. I needed to get the door open, so instead of pushing the swing door open with my shoulder, I kicked it open with my foot. Right into my manager's face. FML

#2647799
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34767) - you deserved it (11111)

On 06/05/2009 at 11:36pm - work - by hellogoodbye (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22728) - you deserved it (75494)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I weighed myself for the first time in a while and confirmed that I have put on a few pounds. I was feeling a bit down about it. I went to work and on arriving a workmate I hadn't seen in a while gave me a hug. She said, 'I love hugging you, you're so nice and squishy.' FML

#2302779
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43976) - you deserved it (7135)

On 05/26/2009 at 4:23am - health - by squishyboy (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I parked my car in a garage that cost $13 for every 10 minutes past 10 o'clock. When I came back to the garage at 10, I had forgotten where I parked it and spent an hour looking for it. I paid $78 to lose my car. FML

#2300061
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21238) - you deserved it (37439)

On 05/26/2009 at 1:39am - money - by lostcar (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was lining a soccer field. I had the entire grid laid out, so I began to paint with a handheld cart. I finished the entire field without looking back once. I forgot to put paint in the cart. I walked around a field for an hour painting with air. FML

#2201893
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13450) - you deserved it (59052)

On 05/23/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by onlyme (man) - United States (Nebraska)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: