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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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peanut_gallery

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peanut_gallery
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  • Number of visits : 2225
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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peanut_gallery's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML

#17026293 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (22424) - you deserved it (3567)

On 07/08/2011 at 9:24am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML

#3430057 (389)

I agree, your life sucks (15545) - you deserved it (35147)

On 07/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by slightlyslow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me because the love advice that she gets on her cellphone every week says that I'm cheating on her. I've never cheated on her and I was planning to propose next week. FML

#2630668 (489)

I agree, your life sucks (72191) - you deserved it (4008)

On 06/05/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a 3rd date with a great guy. Over dinner, he told me that he wanted to see more of me. When I agreed, he pulled out his schedule book and started to tell me he was dating 5 other women besides me. He then told me what week in the "rotation" would be mine. He wasn't kidding. FML

#2624413 (296)

I agree, your life sucks (49685) - you deserved it (2982)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by shescomfortablynumb (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom informed me that she wouldn't be joining the rest of the girls in the limo ride to the church for my wedding ceremony because she wants to have her car with her. Why? Because she is planning to leave my wedding reception half way through to go home and take her dog out to pee. FML

#2357341 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (39370) - you deserved it (2894)

On 05/27/2009 at 9:40pm - animals - by KitKat270 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

#1033363 (405)

I agree, your life sucks (20368) - you deserved it (189274)

On 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by tvaladie (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733 (543)

I agree, your life sucks (35964) - you deserved it (225425)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (373074) - you deserved it (413144)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

#185328 (468)

I agree, your life sucks (28752) - you deserved it (339174)

On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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