About peachesncreem : Soon to be a mama :) hooray!
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Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27131) - you deserved it (35124)
On 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm - misc - by blondie107 - United States (Texas)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57499) - you deserved it (8157)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24845) - you deserved it (7393)
On 03/03/2013 at 1:03pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Bayern)
Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7069) - you deserved it (29704)
On 11/15/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my girlfriend did the walk of shame in a skimpy Halloween costume after a night of drunken sex. Problem? The walk ended at my doorstep, and the sex was with a stranger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27156) - you deserved it (1800)
On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - intimacy - by heartbroke (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out how my parents met. They met at a mental hospital, where they were both being hospitalized. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23690) - you deserved it (1730)
On 06/15/2012 at 11:36am - love - by fail (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9150) - you deserved it (17087)
Today, I got yelled at and called a pedo by a mother after I sat down in a swing next to her daughter. I was too embarrassed to tell her that I'm a 20 year old who really does enjoy swinging in my spare time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17596) - you deserved it (2863)
On 05/27/2012 at 9:13am - misc - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, we got a call that my brother stuck a rock up his nose and couldn't get it out. My mom had to pick him up and take him to the hospital. My brother is 20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16868) - you deserved it (1203)
On 05/23/2012 at 2:13am - misc - by littlebigbrother - Japan
Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18211) - you deserved it (1686)
On 04/02/2012 at 1:38am - kids - by baldspot (woman) - Australia
Today, I got my foot stuck in the car seat belt. I kept pulling to loosen it up but it just kept getting tighter till my foot was in the air, so I started panicking and eventually started crying. My boyfriend had to pull over and save me from a seat belt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6375) - you deserved it (15309)
On 03/29/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by greeneyedpothead - United States (California)
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37624) - you deserved it (3801)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21070) - you deserved it (8334)
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12986) - you deserved it (22136)
On 08/21/2011 at 11:44pm - intimacy - by datingmrpicky (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44826) - you deserved it (2506)
On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 20 May 2013
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