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pauli27

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pauli27

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 April 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 292
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Visits<b>chargers2588</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 9:12am<b>sexyboi1985</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 7:42am

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pauli27's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

Today, I had to walk home in the rain because my mom didn't want to get her new car wet. FML

#20705347
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56637) - you deserved it (3647)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my brother looked me dead in the eyes and said his life goal is to find a way to jizz on everyone in the world. I'm scared. FML

#20703677
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55435) - you deserved it (5020)

On 06/03/2013 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Poland (Kujawsko-Pomorskie)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

#20695159
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62217) - you deserved it (4975)

On 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by life insurance for 1 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML

#20693212
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49819) - you deserved it (3426)

On 05/29/2013 at 2:29pm - misc - by WTFruits - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54943) - you deserved it (4273)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML

#20677562
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27140) - you deserved it (39298)

On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States

Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML

#20675279
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39162) - you deserved it (2962)

On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

#20667250
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72984) - you deserved it (6140)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50391) - you deserved it (8803)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML

#20663182
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41755) - you deserved it (4053)

On 05/14/2013 at 4:09pm - health - by DrewK (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML

#20661189
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46978) - you deserved it (5276)

On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76992) - you deserved it (5267)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

Today, I finally convinced my mom to read Fight Club. As English isn't her first language, she occasionally asked me to translate some of the words. Her latest question: "What's a dildo?" FML

#20657087
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28013) - you deserved it (37547)

On 05/11/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by joeidk (man) - United States (New York)



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