Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

paravoz

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

paravoz

31Fucked!

paravozparavoz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 December 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1265
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About paravoz : PC Gamer. Also, HP, GoT and LotR fan

paravoz's page activity

Visits<b>waffleprincess18</b> - 13 hours ago<b>birdeye1524</b> - yesterday at 1:48pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 10:14am<b>omgnatalie</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 5:43am<b>CristinaXoXx</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:40pm<b>kendalbear</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:24pm<b>Ellykay</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:06pm<b>mnb0113</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 1:44pm<b>wondermoose</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 3:22am<b>lanayamarie</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 10:23pm<b>ohkay12</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 4:34pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 5:10am<b>sam882</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:04pm<b>bps315</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 3:04pm<b>arabian22</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 5:39am<b>mhb210</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 10:52am<b>vlalam</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:47pm<b>MyDadLeftMeInKFC</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:27pm

Fucked!<b>waffleprincess18</b> - 7 hours ago<b>CristinaXoXx</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:40am<b>kendalbear</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 4:24am<b>mnb0113</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 7:45pm<b>wondermoose</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 9:23am<b>MyDadLeftMeInKFC</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:27pm<b>coried91</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 4:17pm<b>arabian22</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 3:52pm<b>xsydneyx123</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 9:40pm<b>nana_star</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 12:18am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:04pm<b>juststephhere</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 6:39pm<b>llamaaduckk</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 8:51am<b>ILikeKoalas</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:29pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:43am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 6:51pm<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:47pm<b>funsizedliz</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:31am

paravoz's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of paravoz's badges

paravoz's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my 2-year-old brother is afraid of his own penis. Whenever he doesn't have a diaper on, he screams, cries and yells, "Ew". FML

#21347945
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (2465)

On 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm - health - by okseñoryoucrazy - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (5215)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34147) - you deserved it (3747)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33631) - you deserved it (3489)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27535) - you deserved it (4646)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28606) - you deserved it (3285)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, I caught my 15-year-old son trying to roll catnip into a joint and smoke it. FML

#21281464
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32324) - you deserved it (4405)

On 10/19/2014 at 11:48pm - kids - by Bad Dad - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML

#21281207
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32361) - you deserved it (5303)

On 10/19/2014 at 4:58pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38310) - you deserved it (3838)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33411) - you deserved it (3944)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

#21256842
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49009) - you deserved it (6830)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44927) - you deserved it (13100)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50686) - you deserved it (9215)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44166) - you deserved it (6278)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: