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paramor3

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paramor3

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 October 1987 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1118
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About paramor3 : I enjoy taking breaks from the real world and reading FMLs. Other than that, I don't have enough white space or time, to get into all the mayhem and madness about me ;) I accept messages though, so feel free!

Dwarves and Wizards and Hobbits, Oh My!

Kik sweetiepi887

paramor3's page activity

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paramor3's favorite FMLs

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20050) - you deserved it (3723)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30263) - you deserved it (8405)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35702) - you deserved it (12885)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20327) - you deserved it (38448)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk to the girl I like. After awkwardly saying hi, I manage to work up a nice conversation with her. I thought everything was going well, until I got home and realized that she had stolen money out of my wallet. FML

#21240655
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33799) - you deserved it (3532)

On 08/18/2014 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was waiting at a stop light in the left turn lane, when a homeless guy on the sidewalk walked up to my car with a, "Bet you can't hit me with a quarter" sign. The lady on my right decided to throw a quarter at him, but it missed and hit my windshield. She yelled, "Oh fuck!" and drove away. FML

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36524) - you deserved it (12882)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27856) - you deserved it (12219)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, I listened to a little girl explain how her scabs taste great with lemon juice. FML

#21240451
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34655) - you deserved it (3149)

On 08/18/2014 at 11:13am - kids - by Stellarum (woman) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39818) - you deserved it (4030)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44381) - you deserved it (4357)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14121) - you deserved it (66979)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

#21237524
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34524) - you deserved it (7573)

On 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35460) - you deserved it (5924)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States

Today, my husband told me he was going to search from store to store in order to find my birthday gift. What was he really doing? His girlfriend. FML

#21202458
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46705) - you deserved it (3615)

On 07/08/2014 at 1:41am - love - by rozsrredd (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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