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parabel

Offline (the 01/15/2015 at 2:07pm) | Search for a member

parabel

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 800
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About parabel : *_*

parabel's page activity

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parabel's favorite FMLs

Today, I dreamed that I cheated on my boyfriend. I was so overwhelmed with guilt that I called him while half-asleep to tell him about it and apologize. I'm fully awake now and he doesn't believe it was really a dream. FML

#21336949
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31186) - you deserved it (7137)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:35pm - love - by ihateeverything (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34328) - you deserved it (2328)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband confessed that when he's angry with me, he uses my makeup sponge to apply his hemorrhoid cream. FML

#21336401
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32362) - you deserved it (3562)

On 01/13/2015 at 12:42pm - love - by Maiar (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend at the store. Before I knew what was happening, he'd sniffed me and started whimpering about how I don't smell like I used to. He does this kind of crazy shit all the time. FML

#21324827
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29686) - you deserved it (3094)

On 12/26/2014 at 6:06pm - love - by GOAWAY - United States (Missouri)

Today, my little sister randomly came up to me and said: "Aww, don't be sad. Even ugly people can get boyfriends." She then smiled, patted my back, and walked off. I wasn't actually sad before, but I am now. FML

#21324793
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30397) - you deserved it (2562)

On 12/26/2014 at 4:54pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea)

Today, I went to break up with my psychotic bitch of a girlfriend after months of abuse. When she opened the door, her 5-year-old son ran up to me, smiling and calling me "DADDY!" for the first time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho and devastate her son. FML

#21324667
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32712) - you deserved it (5103)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss sent me a link on how to write a good resignation letter. FML

#21321621
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27979) - you deserved it (2466)

On 12/21/2014 at 5:02pm - misc - by scoold - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24379) - you deserved it (33126)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34693) - you deserved it (6479)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36376) - you deserved it (3730)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was having a nice conversation with my fiancé when he said out of nowhere, "I sold some of your panties". I thought he was joking so I said I hoped they weren't any of my favorites. He wasn't joking, though, and now some stranger from Craigslist owns my panties. FML

#21317090
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29699) - you deserved it (2552)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by konacoffee17 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32679) - you deserved it (2527)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, I had to babysit my 7-year-old niece while my brother bought Christmas presents. After he left, she walked up to me and said in a very dark voice, "I'm gonna make you hate children!" Now my apartment looks like a bomb site. FML

#21316125
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27482) - you deserved it (2283)

On 12/12/2014 at 10:15am - kids - by Che_likes_you - Australia (Victoria)



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