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parabel

Offline (the 12/17/2014 at 7:27pm) | Search for a member

parabel

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 742
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About parabel : *_*

parabel's page activity

Visits<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 6:39am<b>ohgeejosee</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 1:23pm

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parabel's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you deserved it (29560)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30443) - you deserved it (5844)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to cum if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

#21317298
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32601) - you deserved it (3592)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by dating a moron (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was having a nice conversation with my fiancé when he said out of nowhere, "I sold some of your panties". I thought he was joking so I said I hoped they weren't any of my favorites. He wasn't joking, though, and now some stranger from Craigslist owns my panties. FML

#21317090
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (2534)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by konacoffee17 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31126) - you deserved it (2507)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, I had to babysit my 7-year-old niece while my brother bought Christmas presents. After he left, she walked up to me and said in a very dark voice, "I'm gonna make you hate children!" Now my apartment looks like a bomb site. FML

#21316125
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26485) - you deserved it (2253)

On 12/12/2014 at 10:15am - kids - by Che_likes_you - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend after he received a text with a bunch of hearts on it. After arguing, turns out it was from me. FML

#21316114
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14104) - you deserved it (35242)

On 12/12/2014 at 9:39am - misc - by well, now what - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33690) - you deserved it (4203)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex when a cigarette craving came on. I don't know what's worse, the fact I asked for a cigarette break in the middle of sex or I last that long. FML

#21315600
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21244) - you deserved it (9891)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by cigarettes - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML

#21315592
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29369) - you deserved it (6093)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Anon - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26614) - you deserved it (3179)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML

#21315499
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13351) - you deserved it (33417)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:26am - work - by unlucky (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36891) - you deserved it (2642)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)



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