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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1788
  • Number of comments : 151
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 14 posted

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pandemic's page activity

Visits<b>AlphaDuckPlayer</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 11:08pm<b>airriderz15</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 6:27am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:30am<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:47pm<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:53am<b>danictic</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 1:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:26am<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 12:38pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:51pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 10:23am<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 1:56pm<b>Allegretto</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 12:39am<b>guineagirl</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 9:18am<b>adam97</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Surferboy139</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 11:43pm<b>numbernegative0</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 11:40pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 3:42pm<b>whatisntlove</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 6:30am

Fucked!<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 1:53pm

pandemic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

pandemic's favorite FMLs

Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML

by wantontsu / 09/11/2010 at 2:59pm / Health

Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic". FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2010 at 9:44pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

by Me / 09/10/2010 at 1:30am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

by FYouBoyfriend / 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

by Anonymous / 08/27/2010 at 5:15am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my husband has been out of town for a week. The only text I've got from him was, "I didn't take a poop today." FML

by TextsAlot / 08/26/2010 at 12:08am / Canada (Manitoba) / Love

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

by Ahook1 / 08/23/2010 at 7:31pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I found out the "small termite problem" the inspector told me about wasn't so small when a box from the attic fell through the floor and hit me in the head. FML

by concusion / 08/23/2010 at 5:03am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids

Today, my step-mom informed me that she and my dad will not be attending my wedding because they will be at a NASCAR race. FML

by puppielover / 08/21/2010 at 1:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

by mc_dreamy / 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML

by fullmoonfml / 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I am 9 months pregnant. I had a dream where I successfully pushed and gave birth to my son. Meanwhile, in the real world, I successfully pushed and gave birth to a large dump. FML

by Annakins / 06/06/2010 at 2:31pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids