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pandemic

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pandemic

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1189
  • Number of comments : 151
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 14 posted

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pandemic's page activity

Visits<b>guineagirl</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 9:18am<b>adam97</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 6:19pm<b>Surferboy139</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 11:43pm<b>numbernegative0</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 11:40pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 3:42pm<b>whatisntlove</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 6:30am<b>mFUNdo21</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 4:22am<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 1:01am<b>qpworiruty</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 1:45am<b>Jenmic</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 10:44pm<b>Aniblecoby</b> - the 12/03/2010 at 12:42pm<b>redrovaa</b> - the 12/02/2010 at 9:50pm<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 3:37pm<b>roundnproud</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 2:30pm<b>sw2f2fchik612</b> - the 05/07/2010 at 1:22pm<b>BeeSkwaird</b> - the 05/05/2010 at 9:38am<b>grv</b> - the 04/20/2010 at 5:00pm<b>cuttz911</b> - the 04/12/2010 at 4:37pm

pandemic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

pandemic's favorite FMLs

Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML

#13005012
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29068) - you deserved it (3166)

On 09/11/2010 at 2:59pm - misc - by wantontsu -

Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic". FML

#12995746
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29003) - you deserved it (2198)

On 09/10/2010 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

#12986098
384 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27563) - you deserved it (12297)

On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)

Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML

#12978436
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8438) - you deserved it (38170)

On 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39448) - you deserved it (14836)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

#12768681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40434) - you deserved it (4405)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my husband has been out of town for a week. The only text I've got from him was, "I didn't take a poop today." FML

#12748634
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27642) - you deserved it (3371)

On 08/26/2010 at 12:08am - love - by TextsAlot (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

#12706855
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16896) - you deserved it (47867)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by Ahook1 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out the "small termite problem" the inspector told me about wasn't so small when a box from the attic fell through the floor and hit me in the head. FML

#12697631
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26223) - you deserved it (2816)

On 08/23/2010 at 5:03am - health - by concusion - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41755) - you deserved it (12571)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my step-mom informed me that she and my dad will not be attending my wedding because they will be at a NASCAR race. FML

#12663979
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40977) - you deserved it (3224)

On 08/21/2010 at 1:25pm - misc - by puppielover - United States

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45745) - you deserved it (14572)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45745) - you deserved it (14572)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML

#12483686
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4755) - you deserved it (49831)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by fullmoonfml (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I am 9 months pregnant. I had a dream where I successfully pushed and gave birth to my son. Meanwhile, in the real world, I successfully pushed and gave birth to a large dump. FML

#11011756
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42907) - you deserved it (6442)

On 06/06/2010 at 2:31pm - kids - by Annakins (woman) - United States (Missouri)



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