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paintedwings12

Offline (the 01/20/2015 at 7:39pm) | Search for a member

paintedwings12

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2372
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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paintedwings12's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 6:28pm<b>creativityisnt</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 8:50am<b>ScooperScribbles</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 12:18pm<b>LivClaire96</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:12am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:34pm<b>ArgentumAurum</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:08pm<b>TheCrispyCat</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 1:26am<b>mackdeezy</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 10:29am<b>forizidrizzi</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:23pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 9:14pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:10pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 8:35am<b>lexypaige</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 8:10am<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:25am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 4:04am<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 2:07pm<b>NatashaLovesYou</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 7:47pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 5:55pm

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paintedwings12's favorite FMLs

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

#20966996
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38240) - you deserved it (3208)

On 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

#20959868
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22723) - you deserved it (43891)

On 11/16/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

#20958646
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41715) - you deserved it (2830)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by mummer11 (woman) - Ireland

Today, my dad walked in on me jacking off. He swore and told me to lock my door next time. Later on I heard him snickering and telling my mom that I jack off "real weird." FML

#20957730
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45950) - you deserved it (14679)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by jack s.b. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

#20951750
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65024) - you deserved it (4826)

On 11/09/2013 at 6:30pm - intimacy - by f (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I walked into my dorm room, only to witness my roommate shaving her vag over my trashcan. FML

#20950523
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49762) - you deserved it (4069)

On 11/08/2013 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by JN5SLK (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a text message consisting solely of emoticons. FML

#20950012
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44989) - you deserved it (4207)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:30am - love - by probablydodgedabullet - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44346) - you deserved it (5386)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend left me for another girl. My dad's reaction to the news and my tears was to say, "Aww. Gonna write a song about it, Taylor Swift?" FML

#20942725
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53465) - you deserved it (7797)

On 11/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (50322)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, it's the fourth day of my new diet. I told my friends and family to watch me every time I eat to make sure it's healthy. I got so desperate that I hid some chocolates in my pocket then scarfed them down while pooping. FML

#20941432
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17285) - you deserved it (44651)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:52pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45864) - you deserved it (12441)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

#20935170
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47149) - you deserved it (4258)

On 10/27/2013 at 12:11am - misc - by MsConfusedd (woman) - United States

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend taking a dump in the litter box. He said he wanted to know what it felt like for the cat. FML

#20930986
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (5344)

On 10/23/2013 at 12:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



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