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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 January 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1592
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About oxley642 : Message me if you'd like

oxley642's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 4:58pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 4:02pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Laxoxo224</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:09pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 10:36pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:12pm<b>lspartz</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 11:44am<b>yupitssoph</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 4:02pm

oxley642's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…


You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of oxley642's badges

oxley642's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend put a bunch of cheetos all over me at the beach while I was taking a nap. Next thing I know I'm being woken up by a bunch of seagulls attacking me. One pooped in my hair. FML

by kewlcat / 07/16/2009 at 2:30am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

by MoneyMike / 03/11/2009 at 8:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

by Noname / 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

by caroline / 02/06/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy