oxley642

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oxley642

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 January 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1689
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About oxley642 : Message me if you'd like

oxley642's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 4:58pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 4:02pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Laxoxo224</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:09pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 10:36pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 5:12pm<b>lspartz</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 11:44am<b>yupitssoph</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 4:02pm

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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oxley642's favorite FMLs

Today, my niece, who is fifteen, convinced my six-year-old daughter that her name is spelled C-U-N-T, and just pronounced as Catherine. FML

by cuntsmom / 09/24/2013 at 12:47am / United States / Kids

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

by latter / 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm / Hungary (Szeged) / Love

Today, I found my brother wearing nothing but underwear. That would have been okay if it weren't my lingerie. FML

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I took my girlfriend to a public place before confessing that I've been seeing another woman, to avoid a dramatic scene. After being rushed to the hospital with a concussion and broken nose, I think it's safe to say my plan didn't go very well. FML

by verbaltodomestic / 09/08/2013 at 3:31pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2013 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was sharing the story of how I was born with the umbilical cord around my neck. My sister added that it was God's first attempt to kill me off. FML

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that I have a rack and butt most girls would be jealous of. That wouldn't be bad if I wasn't a dude. FML

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

by criminal tit offender / 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that he would leave me if I didn't seek help for my eating disorder. The eating disorder in question? Vegetarianism. FML

by itsellie27 / 08/30/2013 at 10:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health

Today, I found out after spending my life's income on paying for my grandma's cancer treatment that she has been faking it. FML

by scammed / 08/29/2013 at 2:48pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

by IronSkye / 08/29/2013 at 6:55am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.