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owly_dear

Offline (the 04/11/2015 at 10:47am) | Search for a member

owly_dear

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1851
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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owly_dear's page activity

Visits<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:42am<b>duckwhacker</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 3:30pm<b>whopper_sr</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:52am<b>Roley4498</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 9:18am<b>bigguy52</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 4:48pm

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owly_dear's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a garden gnome to spice up my lawn. Tonight, someone threw it right through my living room window. Not only will the repairs cost a ton, my neighbor keeps saying stupid shit to me, like "You must be shattered" and "Looks like you ain't got a window gnome... more." FML

#21391420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26650) - you deserved it (2862)

On 04/10/2015 at 6:17pm - misc - by dickhead (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he's prepared to commit to marriage, but only if I buy my own ring and tell everyone he surprised me with it. FML

#21391357
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28893) - you deserved it (3074)

On 04/10/2015 at 4:19pm - love - by undanya__four (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I went to class to take an important final for which I studied all week long and worked hard in class. Today, the teacher also told us that anyone who had an A did not have to take the final. I missed out on a trip to the Bahamas for this. FML

Today, my roommate's noisiest cat passed away. My previously-silent cat has decided that someone has to fill the void, and has been running around the apartment howling ever since. FML

#21391230
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27046) - you deserved it (3082)

On 04/10/2015 at 11:20am - animals - by Crazy cat lady - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boss fired me by locking me out of my workplace after I went out to throw out the trash. FML

#21391103
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30213) - you deserved it (2133)

On 04/10/2015 at 2:28am - work - by jobless - United States (Colorado)

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27906) - you deserved it (4598)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was driving and someone was following me across the city and wouldn't let up, so I drove past my house, thinking it was a stalker. Eventually I lost them on the highway. It wasn't until I'd gotten back home that I remembered that my 'stalker' was a coworker I'd invited over for lunch. FML

#21390746
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14657) - you deserved it (37299)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:11pm - work - by Distracted (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a parent of one of the students I teach called me to complain that I was teaching her child "lies" and "fairytales". I was teaching them about the Holocaust. FML

#21390720
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33055) - you deserved it (1808)

On 04/09/2015 at 3:38pm - work - by PrettySureItsReal - United States (Missouri)

Today, my younger sister stopped talking to me. I got engaged to my boyfriend of 4 years and apparently, she's been in love with him since she met him. Through me. She's 12. FML

#21380050
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34503) - you deserved it (2497)

On 03/23/2015 at 10:24am - love - by twelvie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML

#21379776
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30396) - you deserved it (2450)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:24pm - kids - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32832) - you deserved it (6568)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, I had my 18th birthday party. At midnight, three police officers showed up at my door and asked if they could look around. Were we doing anything bad? Nope. My friends suck at parking. Before they left, the officers said that this was the most toned down party they'd seen in years. FML

#21379703
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27165) - you deserved it (31)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:20pm - misc - by dicedicebaby - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw my grandma had registered on Facebook, so I wrote a welcome post on her wall. She replied "Delete." several times, then called me, accusing me of "hacking" her and demanding that I remove my name from her page at once. FML

#21364671
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29107) - you deserved it (2510)

On 02/27/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Y_Y (man) - United States

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29593) - you deserved it (3158)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend threw a fit because I "still" live with my mother at age 30. I bought her an apartment in my building and hired a live-in nurse because she is senile and permanently bedridden. FML

#21354679
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33366) - you deserved it (2202)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)



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