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owly_dear

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owly_dear

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 837
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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owly_dear's page activity

Visits<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:42am<b>duckwhacker</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 3:30pm<b>whopper_sr</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 2:52am<b>Roley4498</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 9:18am<b>bigguy52</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 4:48pm

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owly_dear's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

#21249060
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18264) - you deserved it (1619)

On 08/31/2014 at 1:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23057) - you deserved it (2348)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30979) - you deserved it (7071)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31264) - you deserved it (2474)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33560) - you deserved it (3478)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27639) - you deserved it (6619)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, my little sister was using my phone to play games. About an hour later, she came to me and said my phone wouldn't work. Turns out my phone had gotten hot and she put it in water to cool it down. FML

#21247999
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29568) - you deserved it (3432)

On 08/29/2014 at 5:22pm - kids - by Quincy_Ethan - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a job. My parents have decided it's now a better idea to take money from my paycheck instead of grounding me. FML

Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML

#21247953
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31582) - you deserved it (4240)

On 08/29/2014 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by SCARRED (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35726) - you deserved it (2324)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after finally getting rid of an extremely rude, abusive customer, I muttered that I could kill people like her. I didn't know my manager had heard me, until a pair of police officers arrived. He'd reported me for "threatening to murder a customer". FML

#21247836
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29782) - you deserved it (7832)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:17pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29993) - you deserved it (2700)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after moving into my new house, I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing, convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML

#21247811
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23206) - you deserved it (8876)

On 08/29/2014 at 11:38am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33057) - you deserved it (3008)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32162) - you deserved it (4365)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)



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