owly_dear

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Offline (the 08/06/2015 at 9:11am)

owly_dear

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 October 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5868
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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owly_dear's page activity

Visits<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 1:31pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 8:17pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 3:36am<b>rookworst</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 9:19am<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 2:45pm<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 2:17pm<b>braver7315</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 11:23am<b>thedarkmagician</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 11:45pm<b>pandaboy702</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 10:59pm<b>kingdutchhy</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 8:53am<b>pred8885</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:19am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:50pm<b>jsway8</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:57pm<b>Chazwell77</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 10:34am<b>A07</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:10am<b>badmandilon</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:25pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 10:22pm<b>ajo123</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 1:34am

Fucked!<b>marshm610</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 11:58pm<b>clearlyroo440</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 6:08am<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 9:10pm

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owly_dear's favorite FMLs

Today, as my mom was getting ready for a date, I told her that I think it's too early for her to date, since she divorced my dad only a week ago. She then said, "Don't worry, I'm only in it for sex." FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2015 at 2:05pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandmother ripped her pants. We all got a big view of her pink thong. FML

by cAPITOLpORN / 06/23/2015 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (Havering) / Miscellaneous

Today, after walking in on my roommate, I found out that pleasuring yourself with a shoe is a thing. It wouldn't have been so bad if the shoe hadn't been mine. FML

by UkuleleTime / 06/23/2015 at 4:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to eat dinner with his parents. Everyone wanted me to start the family prayer, and although I hadn't done one in years, I accepted. It went well until I remembered you say "Amen" at the end, not "Uh... Bye." FML

by Arcanin3Boss / 06/23/2015 at 2:37am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I attended my best friend's wedding. Instead of throwing her bouquet, she turned around and handed it to me. I was the only single lady out of 150 guests. FML

by hairstylistprobs / 06/22/2015 at 11:13pm / United States / Love

Today, I discovered that most of my family is homophobic while discussing Orange Is The New Black. I've only come out to my sister. FML

by imgay / 06/22/2015 at 10:20pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

by oh no / 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

by Partners / 06/22/2015 at 3:55pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, while taking a slow night at my waitressing job, I thought I heard the sound of crying coming from the kitchen. I rushed in, thinking something terrible had happened. Nope, the bus boy was just watching porn on his phone with no headphones. FML

by koanroak / 06/21/2015 at 11:08pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband let my 8-year-old twins play with handcuffs. I thought my husband was pretending he had lost the key but after 4 hours, he walked in with his head down and said, "I've made a terrible mistake honey." FML

by hfs palm / 06/21/2015 at 5:37pm / United States / Kids

Today, I took a nap. My boyfriend took this opportunity to go over to his "beautiful" and "amazing" ex-girlfriend's house to help her clean out her pool. I told him I didn't think that was appropriate. He told me I don't value relationships and didn't come home tonight. FML

by bev_rogan / 06/21/2015 at 6:16am / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, my boyfriend murmured his sister's name during sex. Before you say he was thinking of someone else with the same name, I've only ever met one person in our town called Nohemi. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2015 at 12:38am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy

Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML

by hotheadslav / 06/20/2015 at 9:59pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I realized I'm pregnant by a man who won't even accept my Facebook friend request. FML

by happycow122 / 06/20/2015 at 4:54pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a job interview, and my father in law's house. As soon as I got home I went to the bathroom and noticed my bloody pantyliner had fallen out at one of these places. I don't know which one is worse. FML

by organizse / 06/20/2015 at 10:03am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous