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owlishes

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owlishes

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 242
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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owlishes's page activity

Visits<b>zebrainthenight</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 6:45pm<b>JonD63</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 2:37am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 9:46pm<b>mein_blut69</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 7:08pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 2:27am<b>kitcatjb</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 2:46am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 2:52pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 9:51pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 12:10pm<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 6:22am<b>maxhhh</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 4:56am<b>Cuteroxx</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 12:24am<b>madnessking</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 10:38pm<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 2:40pm<b>blackhorizons</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 6:35pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 11:23pm<b>buckeye_state</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 10:13pm<b>xxembabexx</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 12:20am

owlishes's FML badges

Perfectionist

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It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of owlishes's badges

owlishes's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40462) - you deserved it (4018)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML

#21197738
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39766) - you deserved it (16596)

On 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm - animals - by Snow-White (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64894) - you deserved it (32495)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

#21073315
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25266) - you deserved it (55433)

On 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm - misc - by well SHIT (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I proudly informed my grandma that I now have a girlfriend. My grandpa overheard and said how surprising that was, given how expensive blowup dolls are. He and my grandma then both laughed out loud. FML

#21061712
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43885) - you deserved it (5638)

On 02/15/2014 at 6:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46243) - you deserved it (6544)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took a nap in my car right after finishing up at work. I was woken up by a hobo sitting in the passenger seat, watching me sleep. Apparently, he'd managed to unlock the door with a wire hanger. FML

#21027083
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45708) - you deserved it (5372)

On 01/13/2014 at 10:31pm - misc - by ShelterForTheHomless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45634) - you deserved it (4913)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

#21019316
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48804) - you deserved it (17362)

On 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm - animals - by Z3R0G5 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at a baby shower with my wife. I went to go outside for some fresh air, but walked straight into their glass sliding door. Everyone stared at me. I smiled with embarrassment and walked back over to my wife, only to trip over my own feet and faceplant the floor. FML

#21018030
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51398) - you deserved it (6856)

On 01/05/2014 at 4:45pm - health - by stillhurting (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML

#21016927
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39910) - you deserved it (16029)

On 01/04/2014 at 6:43pm - misc - by awkwardpartybear (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I've had my tenth "Christmas" dinner since Christmas last took place. My mum has gone nuts and keeps playing Christmas music, making these dinners, and refusing to let me take down the Christmas decorations. My dad is too whipped to save us from this hell. FML

#21016807
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43961) - you deserved it (4248)

On 01/04/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, my neighbor's sons decided it would be funny to throw rocks at my house. I went outside to scold them and saw my other neighbors gathered around, watching. They didn't stop them because they thought I wasn't home. FML

#21014729
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37442) - you deserved it (3292)

On 01/02/2014 at 9:24pm - misc - by Frustrated (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40223) - you deserved it (9577)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, nothing said Christmas quite like my dad taking 18 shots of vodka, falling on the Christmas tree while holding our 3-year-old cousin and denying it ever happened when he woke up later. FML

#21005822
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35939) - you deserved it (2686)

On 12/26/2013 at 1:48am - misc - by thanks_world - United States (Washington)



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