About otisnme94 : I'm a country girl. I love my truck and family means the world to me
otisnme94's FML badges
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otisnme94's favorite FMLs
Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML
by Anonymous / 03/29/2009 at 1:04am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, there was a luncheon at work in another dept. We all went to get some free food and see new faces. There was a hot girl walking around chatting. I grabbed my buddy's arm and told him there was a "nice pair of tits here" He saw her. It's his daughter. She's a new-hire... running HR. FML
by bluecollar / 02/26/2009 at 3:07am / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, I took my dog for a walk down by the river. I was throwing sticks for him with one hand and talking on the phone with the other. Then I accidentally threw my phone in the river instead of the stick and was standing there talking to the stick while my phone sat at the bottom of the river. FML
by El Boz / 02/22/2009 at 9:52am / United States (Maryland) / Animals
by EpicFail / 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
- Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, I was travelling in a car. As I was discreetly picking my nose, we drove over a speed bump.… Today, at lunch, my seven-year-old daughter and I had a chat. I asked her if she had a sweetheart.…