otisnme94

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Offline (the 11/26/2015 at 7:01am)

otisnme94

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1089
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About otisnme94 : I'm a country girl. I love my truck and family means the world to me

otisnme94's page activity

Visits<b>talleser</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 11:12am<b>Leo619</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 7:02pm<b>chefcow</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 12:41am<b>XlDeathshadowXl</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 3:41pm<b>snorgia</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 11:35pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:18pm<b>ThunderKunt</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:24pm<b>Calibur64</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:25pm<b>bobman3355</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:20pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:16pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:32pm<b>lb562</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:12pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:11pm<b>Pwib</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 5:50am<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:58am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:33am<b>pwnapple99</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:20am<b>cupcakeminella</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 7:16pm

otisnme94's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of otisnme94's badges

otisnme94's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

by dukebluedevils13 / 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

by SydIsPrettyCool / 08/04/2011 at 1:44am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, my three-year-old daughter rushed in, excited about her new baby brother or sister. She was so excited, I didn't have the heart to tell her men can't have babies, and I just have a beer gut. FML

by Anonymous / 07/21/2011 at 7:46pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

by Rejected / 07/16/2011 at 9:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my family attended the funeral of an old family friend's baby, who died in childbirth. Afterwards, my husband went around snickering and quietly telling dead baby jokes to the other attendees. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 7:38pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML

by woah / 05/04/2011 at 7:51am / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

by parentof5 / 04/23/2011 at 11:20am / United States / Kids

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

by Damian / 04/22/2011 at 7:11am / Intimacy

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm / Animals

Today, I was watching Animal Planet while babysitting my 4 year-old niece. A really cute baby bunny came on and I called her into the room, only for her to see it get killed by a Bald Eagle. Now she won't stop crying. FML

by arbiter3 / 04/04/2011 at 6:13am / Kids

Today, my girlfriend called me and asked what I was doing. I replied, "What I'm always doing." She couldn't think of anything besides eating. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 1:39pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML

by Joe / 04/03/2011 at 3:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

by JJMan217 / 04/03/2011 at 3:02am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous