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otisnme94

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otisnme94
  • Town/Country : Somewhere in Maine, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 243
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About otisnme94 : I'm a country girl. I love my truck and family means the world to me

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otisnme94's favorite FMLs

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

#19637447
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12994) - you deserved it (23298)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15269) - you deserved it (2048)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

#19595631
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12853) - you deserved it (26000) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France

Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML

#19594903
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15448) - you deserved it (7690)

On 05/08/2012 at 9:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while at the store, I realized how socially inept I am when I said "excuse me" to a shopping cart because it was in my way. FML

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

#19569212
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17353) - you deserved it (1461)

On 05/03/2012 at 5:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

#19531197
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6182) - you deserved it (27020)

On 04/26/2012 at 6:44am - work - by NoPrivacy (woman) - United States

Today, I witnessed a car accident. Being an experienced paramedic, I rushed to the scene to see if anyone needed help. As I assessed the people involved, one of them pickpocketed me. FML

#19496982
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23101) - you deserved it (1422)

On 04/19/2012 at 6:33pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while driving my car near a farm, I hit a man on the side of the road. I started freaking out and got out of the car to help him. It was then that I found out that I'd hit a scarecrow. FML

#19457431
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15843) - you deserved it (5784)

On 04/12/2012 at 7:53pm - misc - by questionmark707 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

#19449472
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13130) - you deserved it (34865)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

#19291584
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33570) - you deserved it (2536)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:53am - misc - by Taylor Easley - United States (California)

Today, my husband started getting frisky, but I wasn't in the mood, so I said I'd just like to cuddle and talk. He decided a good topic of conversation was whether or not it would be physically possible to smoke my grandma's ashes from the cremation urn. FML

#19279309
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17631) - you deserved it (8342)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:32pm - misc - by solyana vr1 - United States

Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML

#19277499
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8275) - you deserved it (50923)

On 03/14/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up sweating and gasping for air after having a terrible nightmare. The nightmare involved my deceased mother-in-law bitching me out for being a bad influence on her daughter and threatening to cut my nuts off. Even in death, she won't leave me be. FML

#19270798
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23099) - you deserved it (2019)

On 03/13/2012 at 12:13pm - misc - by lanu (man) - United States

Today, I was debating if I actually do talk to myself. I was having this conversation with myself. FML

#19236548
96 comments


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