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orbit

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orbit

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orbitorbit
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 February 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 503
  • Number of comments : 267
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About orbit : "Crestfallen kings and queens comforting in their faith
Unbeknownst to them is the presence of the wraith
Since fate of man is equal to the fate of lice
As new dawn rises you shalt recognize now behold the Lord Of Flies"

orbit's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - 6 hours ago<b>PhantomFollower</b> - 7 hours ago<b>Horsempeg</b> - 17 hours ago<b>cherrio27</b> - yesterday at 2:31pm<b>Ashd09</b> - yesterday at 1:21pm<b>mimidamian</b> - yesterday at 9:32am<b>abdiG</b> - yesterday at 7:56pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - yesterday at 7:35pm<b>Lanker</b> - yesterday at 7:12pm<b>maxyutd</b> - yesterday at 5:08pm<b>2lovelygirls</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 1:57pm<b>captaininouille</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 1:45pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 1:32pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 12:12pm<b>xpsychocatladyx</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 5:16am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 1:20am<b>changster_</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 1:18am<b>slingerslasher</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 12:48am

Liked!<b>violetmay210</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 11:46pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 5:16am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 4:58pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 12:29am<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 4:04pm<b>reiichan</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 1:24am<b>ManateeRex</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 3:12pm<b>sayyestothedress</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 2:26am<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 7:23pm<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 6:59am

orbit's FML badges

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200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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orbit's favorite FMLs

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23324) - you deserved it (4064)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

#21304429
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36281) - you deserved it (4234)

On 11/23/2014 at 11:34am - intimacy - by 404: fuck not given (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I overheard my son mutter to himself, "If Hitler could do it to that many people, so could I..." Anyone recommend a good psychiatrist? FML

#21290608
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32399) - you deserved it (2885)

On 11/02/2014 at 3:57pm - kids - by failure (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37637) - you deserved it (10615)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32607) - you deserved it (4552)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

#21285821
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35762) - you deserved it (3955)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm - love - by mellielynnemily - United States

Today, I woke up to my roommate trying to put a burrito and a pack of mild sauce in between my boobs. He's only lived here for two weeks, and this is the second time I've woken up to him doing something like this. FML

#21278162
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39547) - you deserved it (4647)

On 10/15/2014 at 2:27am - misc - by burritobreasts -

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34654) - you deserved it (3225)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35595) - you deserved it (3031)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I finally got around to cleaning out my mother's things after her passing. In the process I found a fancy box. What did it contain? A collection of crack pipes. FML

#21270609
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36235) - you deserved it (2585)

On 10/04/2014 at 10:58am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47392) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I'm sick with the worst head cold of my life. For some reason whenever I cough, I also fart. Everyone thinks I'm just trying to cover up flatulence with fake coughing. FML

#21266077
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33673) - you deserved it (2916)

On 09/26/2014 at 10:46pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35740) - you deserved it (3651)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I have such severe ADD that I can't focus without my medication. When I take the medication, I can only focus on one thing, but not necessarily the thing I need to be focusing on. I have a chem test soon, and I've been vacuuming my room for the past 4 hours. FML

#21265203
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40870) - you deserved it (4480)

On 09/25/2014 at 3:32pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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