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onorexveritas

Offline (the 03/02/2014 at 7:50am) | Search for a member

onorexveritas

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 February 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4202
  • Number of comments : 1262
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About onorexveritas : Hello! I am I, You are You and We are FML users.

onorexveritas's page activity

Visits<b>HunterHimself</b> - 24 minutes ago<b>Bulldozer36</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Austrand22</b> - 23 hours ago<b>mfaizsiddiqui</b> - 23 hours ago<b>Tobber</b> - 24 hours ago<b>doctorlemons</b> - yesterday at 12:15am<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 5:56pm<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 7:10am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 11:13pm<b>shyeahh</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:49pm<b>TheKingKen</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:24am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 8:27pm<b>annoyed146578</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 5:42am<b>julialovesyou19</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 2:01am<b>gkbowden</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:55pm<b>TheThirdi</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:39pm<b>drunk_in_love</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:48am<b>Wingman527</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:15pm

onorexveritas's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of onorexveritas's badges

onorexveritas's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out eating lunch with my parents when my mom complained that I eat too quickly and don't thoroughly chew my food. My dad exclaimed, "That's because she swallows!" FML

#13640932
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28896) - you deserved it (5263)

On 10/29/2010 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

#12810587
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119535) - you deserved it (11806)

On 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by soldierboy - United States

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

#12674562
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29387) - you deserved it (5217)

On 08/22/2010 at 12:26am - intimacy - by ananomus - United States (Ohio)

Today, I made heart shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML

#8268045
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17646) - you deserved it (3491)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm - intimacy - by adam - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out a friend of mine likes me. It wasn't by a cute gesture like a sweet little note, or a beautiful heartfelt confession like you might expect. He sprang at my boyfriend and choked him (while I strained to pull him off). Right during the middle of our 60+ student populated class. FML

#7635822
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25590) - you deserved it (2577)

On 01/28/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that you need to clean your car more often when you find a mouldy burrito under the back seat. FML

#7560337
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4362) - you deserved it (29281)

On 01/25/2010 at 12:19am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I got on a treadmill for the first time. I was running at a very high speed. I needed a break but didn't know how to get off. I decided to just let the machine take me to the edge so I could get off. I was thrown off the treadmill and landed with my happy sacks crashing into a dumbbell. FML

#7231973
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6657) - you deserved it (36303)

On 01/09/2010 at 5:17am - health - by King7 (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I witnessed my drunk grandmother attempting the Single Ladies dance, complete with hip gyrations and ass slapping. FML

#7125944
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28405) - you deserved it (3199)

On 01/03/2010 at 1:06pm - misc - by ohdear (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49194) - you deserved it (9384)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66763) - you deserved it (15293)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML

#3921342
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42740) - you deserved it (27731)

On 07/21/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by emperor (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

#3682423
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13473) - you deserved it (51625)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)

Today, I busted my ass to help this old lady move her stuff because she was going to a nursing home. I was told I would get paid. When I finished four hours later the lady took me to a room and told me to pick out anything in her little goody bag. I got a race car as payment. FML

#2766394
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47894) - you deserved it (8638)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:03am - work - by person (man) - United States (Ohio)



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