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onealmxwilson

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onealmxwilson

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1013
  • Number of comments : 106
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About onealmxwilson : Braaaap! Motocross is life. The profile pic is me racing my old 2002 suzuki rm 125, but I am now the proud owner of a 2005 honda crf 250r and like it much better. If you have any questions, feel free to message me :)

onealmxwilson's page activity

Visits<b>katherhinooo</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 12:08am<b>shingshangshawn</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:21am<b>beach_babe3</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:46pm<b>Zougibourg</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 6:32pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 2:40pm<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:11pm<b>shaar</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:29pm<b>forevralone</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:05pm<b>AnieAdamantine</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:19pm<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 4:39am<b>max_grant</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:48am<b>MrPurple5106</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:33pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:42pm<b>Ari3l</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:12am<b>NicoleErin</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:50am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 8:39pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 6:51pm<b>thatchick1405</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 1:05am

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100 kick ass comments

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One ring to rule them all

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onealmxwilson's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent the whole day doing a 500 piece puzzle. The last piece didn't fit. FML

#21191359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42811) - you deserved it (6101)

On 06/28/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Puzzlepiece - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML

#21179030
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35287) - you deserved it (11820)

On 06/18/2014 at 2:37am - animals - by a very unlucky dude. - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML

#21161740
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44585) - you deserved it (4193)

On 06/03/2014 at 3:01pm - misc - by mdsfkljsfsdrewr (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML

#21137065
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51766) - you deserved it (7186)

On 05/11/2014 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML

#21124338
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43171) - you deserved it (6042)

On 04/27/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by Shit (man) - United States (California)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

#21101391
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43374) - you deserved it (32154)

On 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

#21091737
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38163) - you deserved it (4312)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm - work - by systematicpanic (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, my car was found with a smashed window and a torn-apart steering column, in order to hot-wire it. The thief didn't get away with my car, though. The engine was in the garage, where I've been working on it for two days. FML

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33870) - you deserved it (11814)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54402) - you deserved it (6011) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48740) - you deserved it (6439)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, marks my third day of school being closed due to snow. One, and only one, of the teachers has decided that we have to do work online in the meantime. I just so happen to be in three of his classes. FML

#20987643
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40589) - you deserved it (4328)

On 12/10/2013 at 12:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, marks my fifth day being an English teacher's assistant. I spent it like the other four days: grading and editing terrible Teen Wolf, One Direction and Doctor Who high school fan-fiction. Six months until I get out of here. FML

#20987358
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37914) - you deserved it (5715)

On 12/10/2013 at 2:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

#20978310
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35437) - you deserved it (24836)

On 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by Sherressa (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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