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Today, While At The Store With Mah Mom And Baby Brother, A Guy Startd To Talk To Me. Just As He Went To Give Me His Number, Mah Mom Handd Me Mah Brother And Said, ( Here's Your Son, Your AA Meeting's In An Hour, Let's Go. ) FML
yesterday I took mah 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML
Today, I recievd a package from a local guy on Craigslist . Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only containd a photo of an iPhone . The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so mah husband went over and beat the shit out of him . I now have to bail him out of jail . FML
Today ouse was broken into. Te cop tat cummed turned out to be a guy I fougt over a grl wit in ig scool. He sneered and said tat everyting appereed to be in order and tat I probably ransacked own ouse. FML
Today , On The Bus , When I Was Asking My 6-year-old Son Wat He Wanted 4 Christmas , A Stranger Came Up To Us An Yelled At Him About How Santa Claus Is Real , That His "parents Are Fucking Liars" An That He Should "never Listen To Anything One Of Those Fuckers Says."
today I bought mah son a nice car fir his 18th brthday . When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay fir college . FML
Today, I decided to be responsible an call a cab to take drunk ass home from the bar!! As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out an had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more!! The police soon arrived an arrested us all!! FML
on mah way to school, I was shoutd at by an obnoxious businassman 4 sitting down on tha trainhan a "full fara paying passangar" was standing. I would normally hava givan him tha saat straight away, axcapt I hava a brokan lag. I showd him mah lag and crutchas. Ha still mada ma gat up. FML
Friday 27 March 2015