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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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omar

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omar
  • Town/Country : strawberry fields, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 June 1993 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 5015
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About omar : hi
i'm omar
i love listening and playing music
if your a funny, cool, down to earth person, feel free to add me
www.myspace.com/ramoluvsnirvana

omar's last visitors

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omar's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

omar's favorite FMLs

Today, I recieved a message on MySpace from a cute guy I've been talking to for a while. It read, "I saw a girl in Old Navy at the mall last night that looked a lot like you, but she was much fatter." I was in Old Navy at the mall last night. FML

#6054945 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (23835) - you deserved it (4346)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:28pm - misc - by girlthatstoofat (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband's daughter told us that she's 5 months pregnant. I'm going to be a step grandmother and I'm only 23 years old. FML

#6001127 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (14154) - you deserved it (31457)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:27am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my long-distance girlfriend asked me if she could see someone else on the side. FML

#6001023 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (4642)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:24am - love - by cheezeits (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a new cat. I tried to reenact the opening scene from Lion King, where in Simba gets held up for everyone to see. The fan was on when I lifted my cat up. FML

#5990692 (42)

I agree, your life sucks (8388) - you deserved it (48254)

On 10/25/2009 at 1:18pm - animals - by stixx (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML

#5002532 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (31257) - you deserved it (12730)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by boytoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (38536) - you deserved it (11324)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (343)

I agree, your life sucks (34979) - you deserved it (98525)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML

#4678208 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (11683) - you deserved it (31164)

On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

#4674126 (346)

I agree, your life sucks (13573) - you deserved it (32523)

On 08/20/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom explained to me that looking up gay porn on the internet is bad. I didn't look up gay porn. The only other person who uses the laptop is my dad. I couldn't tell her the truth and had to pretend I enjoy gay fanfiction. FML

#4645462 (307)

I agree, your life sucks (44165) - you deserved it (3288)

On 08/19/2009 at 12:41am - misc - by weeks (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!!" FML

#4630669 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (74600) - you deserved it (4456)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

#4619260 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (61153) - you deserved it (4232)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

#4113781 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (42478) - you deserved it (6055)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:28pm - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw this cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty and asked for her number. She replied "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML

#4102567 (186)

I agree, your life sucks (5402) - you deserved it (77044)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was sitting in the break room at work eating lunch when I started to choke. My face turned red and tears began welling up in my eyes. Two of my coworkers were there. They began to argue over who would have to give me the heimlich maneuver rather than helping. FML

#4095368 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (33586) - you deserved it (1408)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:11am - health - by swaiteATC (man) - United States (Mississippi)