Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

olpally

Offline (the 04/23/2015 at 9:21pm) | Search for a member

olpally

66Fucked!

olpallyolpally
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 24316
  • Number of comments : 3238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : Follow me on Twitter @OlPally86
I will be deleting this within the next week. Im done. Don't ask for snapchat because I deleted it. I can't live with myself.

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>missa8604</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Sexomancer</b> - 5 hours ago<b>constipation</b> - 23 hours ago<b>madi113</b> - yesterday at 4:07pm<b>0XBlazeX0</b> - yesterday at 11:52pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - yesterday at 11:19pm<b>DraconicFeline</b> - yesterday at 7:27pm<b>amburrjade</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 8:51pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 6:04pm<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 8:17am<b>connectthedots</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:31am<b>KobeLebroJordan</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:57pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:53am<b>dandee_one</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:55pm<b>tintarroja</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 8:50pm<b>satanarroliga</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 11:53am<b>hfudge</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 8:34pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:12pm

Fucked!<b>missa8604</b> - just now<b>KobeLebroJordan</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:57pm<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:56am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:56pm<b>cbreezay</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:07am<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:18pm<b>teapotrevolt</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 6:40pm<b>ariesfyre00</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 2:43am<b>cookiethumper</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 3:28am<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 6:50am<b>Purple_Orgasms</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 12:21pm<b>lilflowjo</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 4:51am<b>jcshadow</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 2:00am<b>keely617</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:57am<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 3:35pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:06am<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:31pm

olpally's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

#21092834
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38941) - you deserved it (3122)

On 03/21/2014 at 5:44pm - health - by iusedprotectionanyway (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boyfriend stormed out after I suggested to him that his relationship with his mother is maybe a little weird. Apparently having regular, hour-long phone discussions about your penis is a perfectly normal thing for a 23-year-old to have with his mother. FML

#21089774
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54080) - you deserved it (6540)

On 03/18/2014 at 5:14am - intimacy - by tiredofcrazy (woman) - Australia

Today, I realized I'm so scared of my manager that I don't even dare to quit my job. The same job I want to quit exactly because I'm so scared of her. FML

Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML

#21089097
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35997) - you deserved it (3624)

On 03/17/2014 at 3:07pm - misc - by IMAWAKE - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML

#21089044
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37771) - you deserved it (6097)

On 03/17/2014 at 2:18pm - misc - by NotInTheRightPlace (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad told me that I can't wear leggings on Friday nights, because, "your butt is too distracting for my poker buddies." FML

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I walked into my elderly client's home for my first day of work. I was immediately hit in the eye with something small, and had to get medical attention for a scratched cornea. It turns out my client likes to clip his toenails right by his front door. FML

#21088031
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38707) - you deserved it (3167)

On 03/16/2014 at 10:00am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

#21087493
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59293) - you deserved it (4552)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm - love - by broken vows (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, four days after making a $100 bet with my balding, pedo-stache wearing dad over who could get a girlfriend first, he came home and introduced me to his new girlfriend. FML

#21087465
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37777) - you deserved it (10306)

On 03/15/2014 at 5:02pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went on a date. As I hugged him, I felt tingles. As a big believer in clichés, I thought it was the tingles of falling in love. Turns out, it was my allergic reaction to his cologne. I now look like I burned my face. FML

#21087087
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41944) - you deserved it (4878)

On 03/15/2014 at 3:35am - love - by Burning Love - United States (Arizona)

Today, in the middle of a Spanish oral exam, I start to panic. My teacher suggests I say whatever pops into my head. I blurt out, "Heeey Macarena!" FML

#21086197
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41111) - you deserved it (8375) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2014 at 12:33am - work - by LeChameauTrisomique - France (Centre)

Today, at a staff meeting, our boss sighed and asked why I'm always in the meetings instead of my co-worker. I reminded him that it's because I'm the department supervisor, not my co-worker. He wouldn't believe me until he saw it for himself in our personnel files. FML

#21084802
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38562) - you deserved it (3633)

On 03/12/2014 at 12:02pm - work - by KBBL (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML

#21084790
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43742) - you deserved it (5015)

On 03/12/2014 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: