Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

olpally

Online | Search for a member

olpally

107Fucked!

olpallyolpally
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 27678
  • Number of comments : 3259
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : Follow me on Twitter @OlPally86
Message me if you want. I'm back. Huge Blackhawks super fan. 2015 Stanley cup champions!!! 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨lets talk hockey! Or anything in general. Love emojis 😘😍😜😁🙊😄Kik- olpally

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>soccer555</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Life_sucksXx</b> - 6 hours ago<b>SecretSociety7</b> - 14 hours ago<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - 14 hours ago<b>MDoremis</b> - 16 hours ago<b>jforren</b> - 20 hours ago<b>annalily5</b> - 21 hours ago<b>fishingforubies2</b> - 22 hours ago<b>kandysnow</b> - 22 hours ago<b>wildhorseman</b> - 23 hours ago<b>BexxyBb</b> - 24 hours ago<b>kevinivek</b> - 24 hours ago<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - yesterday at 3:14pm<b>LaurenSullivan</b> - yesterday at 2:16pm<b>wil1029</b> - yesterday at 12:41pm<b>pratikp03</b> - yesterday at 9:38am<b>TheWarLord314</b> - yesterday at 8:41am<b>macorncob</b> - yesterday at 7:11am

Fucked!<b>fishingforubies2</b> - 16 hours ago<b>BexxyBb</b> - 23 hours ago<b>TheWarLord314</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 1:44pm<b>kandysnow</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 8:55am<b>Thisisascam</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:29am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:15am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:14pm<b>imhope</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:27am<b>CureForCrazy</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 8:34pm<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:55pm<b>FiFiLovee</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 7:27am<b>dewberry2001</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 3:20am<b>erin55378</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 9:12pm<b>herpderpcx</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 8:18am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 4:24am<b>MelodySackett123</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:37am<b>lulubelles</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 9:48pm<b>Clam_igger</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 5:15pm

olpally's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML

#20662901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34138) - you deserved it (18473)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

#20662885
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46242) - you deserved it (3613)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm - work - by sumhub94 - United States

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

#20662624
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56225) - you deserved it (3989)

On 05/14/2013 at 8:03am - health - by toothache - United States (Illinois)

Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML

#20661189
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48722) - you deserved it (5430)

On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter posted a beautiful, touching status on my Facebook wall for Mother's Day. It wasn't so touching that she'd just copied and pasted the one I wrote for her grandmother and sent it back to me, unedited. FML

#20658557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44577) - you deserved it (3988)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:21pm - love - by mothers (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML

#20657738
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51581) - you deserved it (18314)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML

#20654794
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59075) - you deserved it (3389)

On 05/10/2013 at 6:58pm - health - by Chia (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML

#20654425
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59132) - you deserved it (6025)

On 05/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

#20653962
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49525) - you deserved it (5290)

On 05/10/2013 at 8:37am - animals - by FenRackety (man) - Canada

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

#20649324
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41752) - you deserved it (5181)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I gave a presentation about how teachers don't intervene enough when students are being bullied. Afterwards, I was practically bullied by my teacher for "not choosing a serious topic." FML

#20647729
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49959) - you deserved it (5610)

On 05/07/2013 at 2:14pm - misc - by hopelesscollegechick - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was making tea when I smelled something burning. My very fluffy cat had put his tail right next to the open flame and burnt his fur. Now I have a semi-hairless cat and a very smelly apartment. FML

#20647478
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42354) - you deserved it (7003)

On 05/07/2013 at 10:18am - animals - by AussieG75 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excited. Until I realized it was my dad, feeling sorry for me. FML

#20646182
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42865) - you deserved it (3322)

On 05/06/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by sobasics - United States

Today, the girl that I've been madly in love with was demanding I tell her who I liked. I told her no, I should just keep it a secret, but she demanded I tell her. After I told her, the only response I got was, "You're right. You should have kept that a secret." FML

#20644845
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63166) - you deserved it (5942)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:49am - love - by walkingdead_1029 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I finished a dance competition. With competitions, it requires you to wear a lot of makeup like false eyelashes and red lipstick. I went into a Starbucks to get a coffee and a boy around 18 asked me, in all seriousness, what my rate is for one night. FML

#20642261
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57630) - you deserved it (11131)

On 05/05/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by dancer, not a hooker... - Canada (British Columbia)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: