Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

olpally

Search for a member

olpally

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12134
  • Number of comments : 3166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : I can't say too much so I won't.
Ugh. I work way too much.
Unfucking believable. I have the worst luck ever.

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>macorncob</b> - 6 hours ago<b>HitTheRoadJacK3</b> - 22 hours ago<b>katherhinooo</b> - 23 hours ago<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - yesterday at 2:38pm<b>cestidoll</b> - yesterday at 2:39am<b>jessthebst</b> - yesterday at 4:11pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 2:47am<b>nsxgurlie22</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:06pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 2:30pm<b>thisgirlsgotyou</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 11:13am<b>neveropenthat</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 7:08am<b>schwaka</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:02am<b>PurelyCanadian</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 1:02am<b>KaylaLevin57</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 12:32am<b>TheManInWhiteXx</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:18pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 8:27pm<b>MattBenid</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 8:09pm<b>OneDayDown</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 7:21pm

olpally's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first job as a wedding planner. I'd spent a year making sure everything was right. After the wedding my friend comforted me by saying, "You had to have known it wasn't going to be perfect." I knew that it wouldn't be perfect, but I had expected the groom to at least show up. FML

#20676942
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41844) - you deserved it (2758)

On 05/21/2013 at 12:10am - work - by future walmart employee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

#20673360
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43369) - you deserved it (5865)

On 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I reconnected with my best friend from childhood, and after a tearful confession, found out that for most of my engagement to my husband, she was repeatedly connecting with his penis. FML

#20672990
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41241) - you deserved it (2755)

On 05/19/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML

#20671268
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41948) - you deserved it (3374)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45316) - you deserved it (4815)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I received a slip through my door saying that the package I'd ordered couldn't be delivered today because no-one was home to sign for it. I got the slip just in time to watch the guy who put it through my letterbox get in his van, look me in the eye and drive off. FML

#20670426
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46880) - you deserved it (3462)

On 05/18/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by JACKxRAWR (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML

#20670402
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48183) - you deserved it (4947)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41698) - you deserved it (14337)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45757) - you deserved it (2914)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML

#20667410
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50825) - you deserved it (5359)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm - love - by paging dr. kevorkian (man) - Netherlands

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

#20667353
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50174) - you deserved it (8695)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML

#20665269
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40277) - you deserved it (2973)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50387) - you deserved it (8803)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML

#20662901
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33843) - you deserved it (18395)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

#20662885
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44221) - you deserved it (3442)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm - work - by sumhub94 - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: