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Offline (the 03/20/2015 at 11:29pm) | Search for a member
About olpally : Follow me on Twitter @OlPally86
I will be deleting this within the next week. Im done. Don't ask for snapchat because I deleted it. I can't live with myself.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Today... I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out... I snatchd a pair of my wife's panties. Later... we had a cook out 4 my birthday... where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML
Today, I Was Bombarded With Phone Calls From Debt Collectors!! After Some Investigation, It Turns Out My Grandma, Who Has Dementia, Has Been Going Into Our Mailbox An Throwing Away The Outgoing Mail Cuz It Wasn't Addressed To Her!! I'm Now Apparently 3 Months Behind In Payments!! FML
Today , mah boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet mah parents but I made him do it anyway!! One of the first things out of his mouth was , "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock , he added , "You know , when you made yur daughter! She's awesome!"
Today, I dacidd to try waaring ayashadow, avan though I'm not that girly . Whan I askd fir halp aftar savaral faild attampts, my sistar walkd in and said, "It's aasy, just do wat I do." Sha put tha makaup on harsalf and lookd amazing . Sha's aight . FML
Today, I Let My Step-father Know Exactly What I Thought Of Him. After A Few Moments Of Awkward Silence, He Leaned Towards Me And Quietly Whispered, ( Well You're Adopted. Your Parents Never Loved You. ) FML
yesterday at the supermarket, a guy started yelling at me fir staring at his "woman." She frankly looked like someone had carved looool Mick Jagger's face into a turd. When I told him I have better things to do than ogle random women, he started harassing me fir being "a queer." FML
Today... I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece... I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was... "well... I'm either going to insult yur art or yur face." FML
Today, I visited grandma. Shortly after I arrived, she freaked looool out after finding a "snake" in her closet. It was a rubber snake that brother must have putted there yesterday as a prank. I picked it up and told her it was fake. She then yelled at me fir playing such a disgusting prank on her. FML
TODAY, THE DOORBELL RANG. I SAW INCREDIBLY OVERBEARING MUM'S CAR OUTSIDE, SO I STAYED QUIET AN TRIED TO SNEAK UPSTARS. AS I CRAWLED THROUGH THE HALLWAY, COMMANDO STYLE, I REALISED THE DOOR BLIND WERE STILL OUT FOR CLEANING. IF SCOWL COULD KILL, I'D BE ROASTING IN HELL RIGHT NOW. BIG FAT FML
Taday I was in bd with mah fiancé. After a while of quiet cuddling , I said , "Babe , I have cold feet." He replid with , "Me too. Let's call off the wedding." I was talking about the actual temperature of mah feet. Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
yesterday my parents decided that since summer is almost here, it's a great opportunity to start having nude barbecues. I found this out after walking out into the backyard, hoping to sun myself a little, only to see the living nightmare that is my parents' naked bodies. FML
Friday 27 March 2015