Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 32024
  • Number of comments : 3418
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : Follow me on Twitter @OlPally86
Message me if you want. I'm back. Huge Blackhawks super fan. 2015 Stanley cup champions!!! 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨lets talk hockey! Or anything in general. Love emojis 😘😍😜😁🙊😄Kik- olpally

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>elizabeth_black</b> - 5 hours ago<b>GamerGirl2014</b> - 7 hours ago<b>holymacabre</b> - 18 hours ago<b>darksoul43</b> - yesterday at 12:42pm<b>okibi1</b> - yesterday at 9:42am<b>curlyfries44</b> - yesterday at 5:57am<b>liv1222</b> - yesterday at 6:20pm<b>HeartYou101</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 3:42am<b>sweetgurl1985</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 12:05am<b>tubachic8</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 6:26pm<b>Roozb</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:45pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:29pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 1:55pm<b>demi94</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 1:47pm<b>me_ni</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:26am<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 8:41am<b>frecklebrit</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:08am<b>trucker2</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 2:05am

Fucked!<b>GamerGirl2014</b> - 15 hours ago<b>aileen713</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:17pm<b>MidnightB</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 6:39am<b>ZackKP</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 12:43am<b>k_bushey</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 4:34am<b>thejonac</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 5:59pm<b>rileysmiley1</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 5:22am<b>StupidUsername89</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 8:34pm<b>Tori_belle</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 9:49pm<b>KushyMcHaze</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:00am<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 4:05am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 1:05am<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 9:22am<b>AllyJo1231</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 2:40am<b>Mewling_Quim</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 12:15am<b>Addon316</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 7:53pm<b>singlwforlife</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 1:34am<b>isabelc</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 10:42pm

olpally's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML


Today, I was trying to fix a broken desk fan. I'd taken the guard off and was trying to unscrew the blades, when my roommate decided it'd be funny to plug it in. The blades sliced into my thumb. I need stitches, and he still thinks it's hilarious. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41964) - you deserved it (4186)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:17pm - health - by sharkgirl4 - United States (California)

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43015) - you deserved it (3109)

On 08/22/2014 at 9:14am - work - by Beeky (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML


I agree, your life sucks (44579) - you deserved it (6485)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43192) - you deserved it (3783)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45730) - you deserved it (7745)

On 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52282) - you deserved it (3839)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML


I agree, your life sucks (57485) - you deserved it (7402)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I picked up a co-worker from the airport. As she got in the car, she looked over at me and said, "I'm still not sleeping with you". This was our second conversation. The first is when she asked if I could pick her up from the airport. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55236) - you deserved it (6025)

On 06/25/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by headdesk (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I made an excuse and didn't turn up at work. Little did I know my boss did the same. We both bumped into each other at the shopping centre across town. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41182) - you deserved it (24783)

On 06/23/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by AGB10 - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was at the reading of my grandma's will. Apparently I was removed from it some time ago, and the £2,500 I would have gotten went to my cheating bitch of an ex-fiancée. It seems my grandma adored her, and never forgave me for "driving her away" from the family. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49917) - you deserved it (5044)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:06pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56879) - you deserved it (5529)

On 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend once again cancelled a date because he has too much homework. His professor is my dad, who's assigning astronomical amounts of homework to keep us from seeing each other. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59379) - you deserved it (4668)

On 06/19/2014 at 1:28am - love - by professorsdaughter - United States (Washington)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55185) - you deserved it (4831)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while at the waterpark, some guy came up to me and profusely thanked me for wearing a one-piece swimsuit. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50912) - you deserved it (7834)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:44pm - misc - by ifeelfat (woman) - United States

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: