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olpally

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olpally
  • Town/Country : Chicago , il, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (27 years)
  • Number of visits : 8899
  • Number of comments : 3102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : I can't say too much so I won't.
Ugh. I work way too much.

olpally's last visitors

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olpally's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML

#20777956
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43651) - you deserved it (5706)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38714) - you deserved it (4755)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML

#20777868
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45154) - you deserved it (6321)

On 07/12/2013 at 3:33pm - love - by ElodieUNU (woman) - France

Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML

#20777668
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48236) - you deserved it (2326)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided to let me know that she almost left me for another guy not so long ago, because he was more handsome and talented than me. The reason she didn't leave: "He's out of my league; you're not." FML

#20777616
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46981) - you deserved it (3812)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I received a text from my dad, which was borderline-incomprehensible due to an insane amount of text language. I replied, jokingly asked if he had a stroke while writing it. A few seconds after hitting send, I remembered the stroke he suffered last month. FML

#20777593
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19350) - you deserved it (46864)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:35pm - misc - by hellbound (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56200) - you deserved it (6635)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my college English teacher told me if I wanted an explanation for my grade I would have to schedule a conference to come to her office. It's an online class. I took an online class because I can't come in. FML

#20774966
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36257) - you deserved it (3386)

On 07/10/2013 at 8:15pm - work - by myl1f3isfuct (woman) - United States

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42366) - you deserved it (4027)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, not only do I work as a garbage man, but I had to pick up a used, bloody tampon that someone decided to throw on the ground rather than in a garbage can. FML

#20768438
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48238) - you deserved it (4563)

On 07/07/2013 at 9:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was going to fight the guy who my girlfriend left me for. While waiting at the park, he sent me a video of the two of them having sex on my bed. FML

#20768398
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60819) - you deserved it (18980)

On 07/07/2013 at 8:35am - love - by SimG (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was asked to help my sister clean her room. The moment I opened the door, I was greeted by her screaming "TASTE THE RAINBOW" with a full mouth. She then spat the skittles into my face. FML

#20768354
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39963) - you deserved it (4113)

On 07/07/2013 at 6:55am - kids - by tastetherainbow - United States (Texas)

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

#20765643
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39744) - you deserved it (4176)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:59pm - misc - by -_- (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was chatting online with several relatives, discussing our family reunion. Bored out of my mind, I clicked to rename the conversation to "Boring shit with almost dead people." I didn't know it'd rename it for everyone. FML

Today, I was taking some clothes downstairs to wash, when my mum stopped me. She accused me of sleeping around and trying to hide something, since she did the washing yesterday. She made me admit in front of the whole family that I'd been "surprised" by a case of diarrhea. FML

#20761546
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36623) - you deserved it (2210)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:19pm - health - by ToiletTroubles (woman) - United Kingdom



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