Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

olpally

Online | Search for a member

olpally

34Liked!

olpallyolpally
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 16 May 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 18330
  • Number of comments : 3208
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About olpally : I can't say too much so I won't.
Unfucking believable. I have the worst luck ever. Fuck this shit, I give up.
Kik: olpally. Don't be creepy.
Hate my damn life. Ugh.

olpally's page activity

Visits<b>rustycage92</b> - one hour ago<b>jillylamb</b> - 2 hours ago<b>skiddymarker</b> - 7 hours ago<b>anonymuzzz</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Lustig_Junge</b> - yesterday at 3:04pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - yesterday at 1:38pm<b>pissflap</b> - yesterday at 8:30am<b>vampy719</b> - yesterday at 11:01pm<b>macorncob</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 2:55pm<b>Belle0007</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 10:31pm<b>14kgold</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 9:18pm<b>tuxedoandex</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 8:41am<b>HitTheRoadJacK3</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 12:13am<b>sweetsammiedee</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 8:11pm<b>satanarroliga</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:08pm<b>bloo_isanonymous</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:04pm<b>Alicestraza</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:16am<b>Sonotsuave</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:57pm

Liked!<b>tuxedoandex</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 2:27am<b>emeraldisle</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:50am<b>feven</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 3:35am<b>kimmi5</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Araizaboi</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 6:58pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 7:31am<b>gilliano</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 10:18pm<b>randomgirl1234</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 12:49pm<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 6:01pm<b>cfan</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 5:57am<b>poppunkette</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:05am<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 5:19am<b>rpsrascal</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 10:55pm<b>nemcali</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:57pm<b>curlytop101</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 8:20am<b>kenny26f</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 5:48am<b>ilovefood17</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 5:21am<b>redbootsarecool</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 11:54pm

olpally's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of olpally's badges

olpally's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML

#21292742
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35402) - you deserved it (8571)

On 11/05/2014 at 2:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my husband told me he cheated on me two years ago with his ex-fiancée. In the process, he got her pregnant, but said it was okay, because she didn't keep it. FML

#21284646
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37915) - you deserved it (2602)

On 10/24/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as a limo driver, I had to drive 8 guys for a night-out from their wives. I put the Michigan/Rutgers game on the radio, thinking they would appreciate that. Apparently, they wanted to listen to their "pump-up" songs instead, which were mostly Katy Perry songs. FML

#21271972
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36744) - you deserved it (4696)

On 10/06/2014 at 11:05am - work - by theseguysarewhipped... - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41261) - you deserved it (4339)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Dulux". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

#21257403
92 comments

Today, I found out my fiancée's been cheating on me. Her excuse? Her ADHD made her do it. FML

#21257049
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39478) - you deserved it (3083)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

#21245913
80 comments

Today, I was trying to fix a broken desk fan. I'd taken the guard off and was trying to unscrew the blades, when my roommate decided it'd be funny to plug it in. The blades sliced into my thumb. I need stitches, and he still thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21245038
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39218) - you deserved it (3899)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:17pm - health - by sharkgirl4 - United States (California)

Today, I was excited to receive a rejection letter, because this was the first company to even acknowledge that I sent them a resume. FML

#21243040
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40163) - you deserved it (2742)

On 08/22/2014 at 9:14am - work - by Beeky (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML

#21239720
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34185) - you deserved it (5688)

On 08/17/2014 at 12:40pm - love - by ugh thanks - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

#21230823
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39822) - you deserved it (3251)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

#21207158
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42457) - you deserved it (7015)

On 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML

#21192088
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49869) - you deserved it (3671)

On 06/29/2014 at 12:16am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51750) - you deserved it (6630)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I picked up a co-worker from the airport. As she got in the car, she looked over at me and said, "I'm still not sleeping with you". This was our second conversation. The first is when she asked if I could pick her up from the airport. FML

#21187469
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50047) - you deserved it (5434)

On 06/25/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by headdesk (man) - United States (Hawaii)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: