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ollallie

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ollallie
  • Town/Country : weatherford, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 January 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 635
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About ollallie : ...

ollallie's last visitors

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ollallie's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
394 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29516) - you deserved it (2879)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28889) - you deserved it (1847)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML

#19712104
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19144) - you deserved it (1106)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:20pm - work - by Elmoo - Netherlands

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

#16339516
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45448) - you deserved it (13597)

On 05/25/2011 at 4:23am - intimacy - by katie -

Today, my son and I attended my mother's funeral. It was the first time he'd been to such an event, so to ease his grief and distract him, I turned on Max and Ruby when we got home. He quickly broke into tears; apparently, it was the episode where Max and Ruby prepare their grandma a special birthday gift. FML

#14950396
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24995) - you deserved it (3387)

On 02/12/2011 at 1:57pm - misc - by sadcartoons (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I made the discovery that I'm in a true love triangle; both of my girlfriends are dating one another. FML

#14948891
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10769) - you deserved it (44673)

On 02/12/2011 at 11:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a police officer gave me a ticket for smoking. He told me that my parents would have to be contacted to come pick me up. My drunk dad came to the rescue, and almost hit the police car. Way to go dad. FML

#14945548
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17674) - you deserved it (12008)

On 02/12/2011 at 3:05am - misc - by savanna(: - United States (Utah)

Today, in an effort to make new friends in my history class, I sat in the empty seat next to a friendly-looking guy. He got up, walked away, and sat down in a different seat. FML

#14938952
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (2871)

On 02/11/2011 at 7:08pm - misc - by loner - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML

#14830027
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30131) - you deserved it (4769)

On 02/03/2011 at 7:28pm - intimacy - by Embarrassed -

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49734) - you deserved it (4536) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML

#14605764
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46929) - you deserved it (3598)

On 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

#14377824
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33640) - you deserved it (3512)

On 12/29/2010 at 2:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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