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oliviafield

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oliviafield

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  • Number of visits : 2482
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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oliviafield's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:27pm<b>jc21</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 5:15pm<b>DarthFurby</b> - the 07/16/2009 at 4:42am<b>bedspring_kiss54</b> - the 05/27/2009 at 2:27am<b>nuclear</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 7:44pm<b>jfool</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 7:16pm<b>SergioFML</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 7:37pm<b>itsgen</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 3:32pm

oliviafield's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

oliviafield's favorite FMLs

Today, my best friend slapped me and called me a some colorful words before telling me that she never wanted to talk to me again because I supposedly slept with her boyfriend. Not only am I a virgin, but I'm a lesbian. FML

#169913
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (177342) - you deserved it (14530)

On 03/01/2009 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by xo_lezz (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend my self and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house but I left my radio turned on. FML

#159713
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17565) - you deserved it (42930)

On 02/28/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Slipperywhenwet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

#158758
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20428) - you deserved it (37499)

On 02/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by RosaP (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML

#144886
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10525) - you deserved it (71250)

On 02/26/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by belladonna (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, an extremely large lady came into the dry cleaners where I work. She puts what I assume is a blanket on the counter to be dry cleaned. I said, "So just the one blanket then?" She replied, "Those are my pants, not a blanket." She was a size 56. FML

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

#133145
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14205) - you deserved it (66235)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm - work - by foolishgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms for my girlfriend, Kim and I. I was in a rush and when I looked at the cashier realized it was her father. Nervous and hoping to reassure him, I go "don't worry, I'm not using these with Kim." That didn't help. FML

#107795
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25417) - you deserved it (66121)

On 02/22/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by madfather (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother told me she was going out of town this weekend. I re-assured her that I would not throw a party. She replied "Oh, like you have enough friends to do that." FML

#98981
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41554) - you deserved it (3723)

On 02/21/2009 at 8:20pm - misc - by stinker (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was telling my mom that I was really nervous about going to the gynecologist for the first time. Her response, "Oh don't worry, it's not like it's the first time you've spread your legs!" FML

#98125
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37662) - you deserved it (9289)

On 02/21/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by taperjeangirl - United States (Washington)

Today, in school my shoulder was killing me from a softball injury. I went to the nurse's office and asked "Can I have some ice?" They responded with "Why, what happened to your face?" FML

#75712
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43013) - you deserved it (2479)

On 02/19/2009 at 2:09am - misc - by Offended (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked by my roommate and his girlfriend while they were hugging. I asked "what's up lovebirds?". Turns out they were in the middle of a breakup. FML

#51436
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36389) - you deserved it (9284)

On 02/16/2009 at 2:36am - misc - by dammit_ (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

#48381
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42855) - you deserved it (9448)

On 02/15/2009 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (Missouri)

Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML

#33255
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17560) - you deserved it (38625)

On 02/12/2009 at 7:54pm - misc - by SmokedSalmon (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML

#19641
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9150) - you deserved it (38712)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a meeting at work. My boss was there as well as her boss, and a few other managers and directors. We started discussing politics in the context of our latest project. I tried to say "erratic election". I almost succeeded. FML

#12756
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21673) - you deserved it (5150)

On 02/07/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Flubber (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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