Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 582
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

olive47's page activity

Visits<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 11:09am<b>TheSovietOnion</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 5:14pm<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:28pm<b>marinegrant</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 12:03pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 3:19am<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 10:24pm<b>redneck_wolf</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 1:08pm<b>Kitty19</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:04am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:06am<b>AetherFox42</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 12:37am<b>wopchop12</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 2:47pm<b>hihello18</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 8:40am<b>tigerfish</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 10:50am<b>forshey13</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 11:39pm<b>tim1999</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:47pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 10:02am<b>Hellishness</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 1:41pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 01/30/2013 at 10:12pm

olive47's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

olive47's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

by Michelle / 12/27/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a red light camera ticket for $100 in the mail. After checking the date and time, I realized it was from when I was rear ended into the intersection while STOPPED at a red light. FML

by corfan01 / 10/05/2009 at 7:11am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2009 at 1:19am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I was on my girlfriend's computer. When searching on google, her browsing history popped up. The first thing was "Best positions for a small penis." FML

by wtf / 07/12/2009 at 12:20pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I got an "Enlarge your penis" email for the millionth time. I was about to dismiss it when I saw the FW: from my wife. FML

by Ariel / 06/02/2009 at 8:19am / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Intimacy

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

by nana / 05/19/2009 at 10:04am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, I went to have a sperm analysis done at the fertility clinic. I spent an hour trying to masturbate into a cup but I was too anxious and couldn't finish. There was a knock on the door, a clinician and a lab assistant both were there, wondering if I was ok. I have to go back next week. FML

by alpine75 / 05/03/2009 at 12:47pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I was looking at my recommendations on Amazon, which included several vibrators. Just a few days earlier I was looking at books on anger management. Amazon thinks I need to get laid. They're right. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2009 at 6:53pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

by yuckspider / 04/19/2009 at 8:17pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 9:04am / Malta / Intimacy

Today, I farted in my cubicle thinking no one would smell it. Two seconds later, everyone came to my cubicle to wish me a happy birthday. FML

by riappp / 02/25/2009 at 10:31am / United States (New York) / Work