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  • Number of visits : 7147
  • Number of comments : 840
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 49 posted

About oj101 : Orange Juice

oj101's page activity

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oj101's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of oj101's badges

oj101's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing... even the bottom, which said, "April fools! Love mom and dad." FML


I agree, your life sucks (62587) - you deserved it (6248)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by madiison09 - United States

Today, I woke up to discover that the guy I hooked up with last night did indeed have a mullet. FML


I agree, your life sucks (18613) - you deserved it (57832)

On 03/08/2013 at 1:01am - intimacy - by WeHitTurbulence (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (38559) - you deserved it (5746)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm - kids - by peace out - United States (South Carolina)

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9766) - you deserved it (72561)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:48am - work - by is there a environmental scientist in the house? - United States (California)

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38380) - you deserved it (7115)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36763) - you deserved it (4213)

On 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm - misc - by DumbCuntApparently (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43966) - you deserved it (2861)

On 02/24/2013 at 6:17am - animals - by incendiaaa (woman) - Australia

Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36048) - you deserved it (2883)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML


I agree, your life sucks (39281) - you deserved it (3466)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32875) - you deserved it (7434)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34633) - you deserved it (4687)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML


I agree, your life sucks (9800) - you deserved it (49996)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by swarm20 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while checking out a couple at work, I handed them their receipt and wished them a good day. The woman promptly pulled her husband to the side, and whispered to him about how much of a "fucking idiot" I was for making the prices so high. I work at McDonald's. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29545) - you deserved it (2261)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:06pm - work - by stupidapperently (woman) - United States

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (51476) - you deserved it (3880) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28622) - you deserved it (2627)

On 01/29/2013 at 10:18pm - health - by motherless - Australia (New South Wales)

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