Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ohJeeznotme

Search for a member

ohJeeznotme

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2106
  • Number of comments : 116
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ohJeeznotme's page activity

Visits<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Natetc13</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:08am<b>munuxi</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 3:05am<b>jtacket3</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:57pm<b>Itstopsecret</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 10:23am<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/18/2009 at 4:39pm<b>littlegolferboy</b> - the 09/04/2009 at 1:43pm<b>awesomebrother</b> - the 08/24/2009 at 6:06pm<b>McA513M</b> - the 08/06/2009 at 12:44pm<b>morgonia</b> - the 08/06/2009 at 10:57am<b>56578</b> - the 07/16/2009 at 5:51pm<b>kapay</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 12:06pm<b>jpi13</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 5:58pm

ohJeeznotme's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of ohJeeznotme's badges

ohJeeznotme's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32877) - you deserved it (5851)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the world did not used to be black and white. It was just the pictures that were. She still doesn't believe me. She's eighteen. FML

#19276451
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25476) - you deserved it (2276)

On 03/14/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by CierraJordan - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28867) - you deserved it (18073)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28867) - you deserved it (18073)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28867) - you deserved it (18073)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34796) - you deserved it (5445)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML

#19260782
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24432) - you deserved it (3024)

On 03/11/2012 at 10:49pm - misc - by me (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while moving, I asked my wife where she put the alcohol. She told me she threw it out, because it was old. It was Scotch. It's supposed to be old. FML

#12343499
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38902) - you deserved it (5222)

On 08/06/2010 at 12:40am - love - by rugs - United States (Iowa)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18071) - you deserved it (5070)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: