![[fr]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn4.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
This member hasn't filled in the description.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7272) - you deserved it (514)
On 05/19/2012 at 6:54pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my fiancé emailed me some steamy pics. Too bad he forgot to erase "FWD:" from the subject line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5717) - you deserved it (509)
On 05/18/2012 at 12:05pm - love - by ohyesIfeelspecial (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4972) - you deserved it (1098)
On 05/18/2012 at 11:05am - love - by Great. (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1497) - you deserved it (12246)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:41am - health - by TLJ321 -
Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1829) - you deserved it (8145)
On 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I finally got the chance to meet this wonderful guy I met on a dating site. She was very excited to see me, too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6231) - you deserved it (1147)
On 05/16/2012 at 1:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I fell into a hole. And by hole, I mean a sewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6231) - you deserved it (672)
On 05/16/2012 at 6:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I discovered that my acne glows yellow and orange under black lights while in front of a wall of them at a club. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5701) - you deserved it (564)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after 4 days of constipation, I finally pooped. Sadly, I was not on the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7532) - you deserved it (639)
On 05/13/2012 at 11:14pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1904) - you deserved it (7390)
On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)
Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1870) - you deserved it (10297)
On 05/13/2012 at 2:26am - work - by fired - United States (Oregon)
Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5085) - you deserved it (437)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore
Today, I got all my wisdom teeth out. Have you ever thrown up after mouth surgery? Stomach acid in your bloody gum holes is just as fun as it sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18549) - you deserved it (1070)
On 05/12/2012 at 2:41am - health - by lspicknall - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9616) - you deserved it (1506)
On 05/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by rawr_fml001 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I saw a little boy, clear as day, walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6436) - you deserved it (1840)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
