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octopussperm125

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octopussperm125

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2478
  • Number of comments : 124
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About octopussperm125 : Idk, i gotta think......

OH GOLLY, I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING!!!!!!!, i need more weed. Like badly. Like so badly that im writing about it. Like so bad, im writing it twice. I need it so bad, im writing it a third time.

Tommy Chong should be the king of America. Obama should adopt a fruit fly. I have no idea what the fuck im writing.

I GOT MORE BUDHA!!!!! YAYYY!!!! Time to get stoned. See ya later world. I invented the rocketship toilet and im guna fly into Uranus in the year 5879. For now, you can stay in mianus. Jk

octopussperm125's page activity

Visits<b>omgpp</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 6:09am<b>crossdresseryau</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 9:36am<b>deathposts</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:28am<b>myoukei</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 6:44pm<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 11:23pm<b>DARKDAY07</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 9:49pm<b>Rallred32</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 11:58am<b>jacknapes2000</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 12:11am<b>partyartie</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 1:35am<b>inn0centaphid</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 5:09pm<b>bingo__O</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 4:34pm<b>shadowedpixie</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 2:05pm<b>boredgirl123</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 6:50pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 8:49am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:59am<b>DEATHSNIGHTMARE</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 12:27am<b>R3TROxLOV3</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 9:53pm<b>ygdrassil</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 6:44pm

octopussperm125's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of octopussperm125's badges

octopussperm125's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother and I got into an intense argument that ended up with us trading blows and having the cops called on us. Apparently I was "insulting his intelligence" by trying to explain that you don't make buttermilk by putting butter in milk. He's 18. FML

Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML

#20945220
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45772) - you deserved it (10168)

On 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by barebackingit (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was telling my friends a story. I added a few "embellishments" to make it more intense. One my friends piped up with, "I was with you, half of what you just said wasn't true". It's now all over Facebook and I'm known as "The Bullshitter". FML

#20944930
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16107) - you deserved it (64642)

On 11/04/2013 at 6:39am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

#20944161
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39090) - you deserved it (4311)

On 11/03/2013 at 5:27pm - kids - by don'tdrinkthat - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom found a new fad, and now styles herself as some kind of modern druid. Normally I'd just roll my eyes and deal with it, except she's forced the entire family to go vegetarian, threatening harsh punishments if we refuse to stop "poisoning" our bodies. FML

#20943896
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36969) - you deserved it (2962)

On 11/03/2013 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a friend sent me to a guy he knows who repairs various electronics for a very low price. Good news: he fixed my malfunctioning iPad. Bad news: it took me several hours to notice that he'd carved the words DOUCHE and HIPSTER into the back panel. FML

#20934676
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36325) - you deserved it (6990)

On 10/26/2013 at 3:48pm - money - by fuckyouverymuch - United States (California)

Today, a friend sent me to a guy he knows who repairs various electronics for a very low price. Good news: he fixed my malfunctioning iPad. Bad news: it took me several hours to notice that he'd carved the words DOUCHE and HIPSTER into the back panel. FML

#20934676
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36325) - you deserved it (6990)

On 10/26/2013 at 3:48pm - money - by fuckyouverymuch - United States (California)

Today, my dog had an upset stomach and diarrhea. To avoid a mess on the carpet, I confined her to a gated area in the kitchen with sheets over the floor, so any mess could be cleaned up easily. Instead of going on the sheets, she sprayed shit all up the walls. FML

#20933932
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42858) - you deserved it (6478)

On 10/25/2013 at 9:50pm - animals - by kiwibox - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents at a family dinner. There was plenty of alcohol on offer, as is normal at our get-togethers. She got blind drunk and ended up crying to my mum about how I can't please her because I have a small penis and my oral sucks. FML

#20933730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52908) - you deserved it (9077)

On 10/25/2013 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Dick the Greater (man) -

Today, I decided to try LSD with a few friends in a safe environment. As an artist, I had planned to spend my trip doing psychedelic paintings and had all my supplies set up. Apparently I spent most of my time in fetal position muttering about the "evil easel" and never even touched my canvas. FML

#20930479
333 comments

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

#20929956
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45003) - you deserved it (4767)

On 10/22/2013 at 5:12am - animals - by IamAflyingCat - United States

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31321) - you deserved it (10544)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

#20928358
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41186) - you deserved it (3152)

On 10/20/2013 at 11:51pm - kids - by momaaa1342 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

#20928153
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34809) - you deserved it (3527)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm - misc - by the_lameo_geek (woman) - United States (New Mexico)



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