Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

octopussperm125

Offline (the 09/15/2014 at 5:46pm) | Search for a member

octopussperm125

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2640
  • Number of comments : 141
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About octopussperm125 : Idk, i gotta think......



...so i learned i dont like to think.

Thats problably why i've also made so many dumb decisions.

But just remember that bad ideas will become great stories!

octopussperm125's page activity

Visits<b>ChelzTheWolfGirl</b> - 14 hours ago<b>red319</b> - 22 hours ago<b>slumcat</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:26am<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:29pm<b>DGSutcliff</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 10:41pm<b>KingZach</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:37pm<b>lilpsyco</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 4:39am<b>ksmith233</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:00pm<b>Wyseguy</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:45pm<b>drunkmunkey</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:15pm<b>tostada1011</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:09pm<b>Ethan4an</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:02pm<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 11:38am<b>Falkin0113</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:58am<b>cdawg69</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:41am<b>JuggaloSimms1441</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:47am<b>SaintGoobers</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:33am<b>Preposterous</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:32am

octopussperm125's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of octopussperm125's badges

octopussperm125's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered my sister has a crystal meth problem when she set fire to our house. FML

#18198070
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32937) - you deserved it (2229)

On 11/08/2011 at 11:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got mugged by a guy who was threatening me with a stapler. FML

#18191865
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27165) - you deserved it (8009)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:39am - misc - by StaplerScared - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

#18191670
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38870) - you deserved it (3857)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43118) - you deserved it (7860)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

#18183017
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15638) - you deserved it (31360)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Luke - United States (Virginia)

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

#18183017
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15638) - you deserved it (31360)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Luke - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

#18182863
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28664) - you deserved it (3516)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:24am - work - by Dlord357 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while jogging, I realized my face jiggles more than my breasts. FML

#18180881
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28279) - you deserved it (7143)

On 11/07/2011 at 12:12am - misc - by Janice - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to endure yet another evening of the old man in the apartment above me screaming, "No, I don't want to shave my nose hair, you crazy bitch." He lives alone. FML

#18178318
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27829) - you deserved it (1987)

On 11/06/2011 at 8:23pm - misc - by hurtsmyears (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's my 21st birthday. My parents' gift was a case of non-alcoholic beer, to "prepare" me for when I "turn 21." My parents can't even remember how old I am. FML

#18177670
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29221) - you deserved it (1997)

On 11/06/2011 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

#18167673
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15472) - you deserved it (34904)

On 11/05/2011 at 8:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked him if this was his happy place too. He said, "Nah, it's in pussies." FML

#18165328
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29017) - you deserved it (9143)

On 11/05/2011 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by whatadisappointmnet (woman) - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. I was leaning against him when he reached around, grabbed my boobs, and started making "pew-pew" laser noises, all in front of his family. I can't believe I'm dating this child. FML

#18159889
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34805) - you deserved it (14222)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Sidney (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was dared to walk home through a rough part of town. My rep hung in the balance, so I accepted. A kid kicked a football in my direction, so I kicked it back at him hard. It hit him in the nuts, and the next thing I know, I'm running for my life from three bald, shirtless, six-packed thugs. FML

#18159887
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13053) - you deserved it (32457)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, at work, my mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen, and messed up an entire day's attempted work. As I was leaving, I overheard one of my co-workers saying he'd plugged a wireless mouse adapter into my computer, and had been trolling me all day. FML

#18156228
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33734) - you deserved it (3970)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by tech_support (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: