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octopussperm125

Offline (the 01/24/2016 at 6:22am) | Search for a member

octopussperm125

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 December 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7131
  • Number of comments : 152
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About octopussperm125 : Idk, i gotta think......



...so i learned i dont like to think.

Thats problably why i've also made so many dumb decisions.

But just remember that bad ideas will become great stories!

octopussperm125's page activity

Visits<b>Avi8r</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 9:18am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 12:54pm<b>NomeDMF</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 9:28pm<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 10:21pm<b>pengyvan</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 12:12am<b>pshaps</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 4:23am<b>Seashells77</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 4:21pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 10:25am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 12:40pm<b>bandgeek109</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:46am<b>swazii</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:02pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:28pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 2:09am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:12am<b>facelick</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 6:29pm<b>Cian_1</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 6:45am<b>Pauline96</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:29pm<b>kerstileann</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 1:30am

Fucked!<b>Seashells77</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 10:22pm

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octopussperm125's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized I was getting a bit chubbier than usual. I decided to go for a little jog to stay in shape. Little did I know, my neighbors that just moved in brought along with them, a fully grown German Shepherd. Not tamed. My "jog" quickly turned into a "sprint for my life". FML

#19600497
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28267) - you deserved it (2884)

On 05/09/2012 at 11:34pm - misc - by I Don't Exorcise - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

#19598679
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31289) - you deserved it (3228)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML

#19558069
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28539) - you deserved it (2245)

On 05/01/2012 at 12:17pm - health - by karmafails (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

#19557716
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24227) - you deserved it (4801)

On 05/01/2012 at 9:58am - work - by Nice (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39322) - you deserved it (9386)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, I was looking through my roommate's room trying to find a DVD, when I stumbled upon a bundle of pictures of me showering and sleeping. FML

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

#19546385
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11405) - you deserved it (20999)

On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I spoke to my ex again for the first time after our breakup. The first words out of his mouth were, "I love you, so I'm going to have to confess some things in the hopes that my honesty will help us get back together." It didn't, but it does mean I have to get tested now. FML

#19546039
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31929) - you deserved it (3079)

On 04/29/2012 at 2:41am - health - by Anne - United States

Today, I found out that of the three medications I am taking for depression, one causes weight gain, one causes severe weight gain, and one "might cause weight gain." FML

#19545026
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30171) - you deserved it (3212)

On 04/28/2012 at 11:00pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while enjoying breakfast, my teeth took a chunk out of my cheek. This happens regularly, even when I'm talking. Both my doctor and dentist have no idea why, and I'm in utter agony. FML

#19533768
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23736) - you deserved it (2519)

On 04/26/2012 at 7:04pm - health - by bucktooth - United Kingdom

Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML

#19531341
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28097) - you deserved it (2809)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents over dinner. During the meal, he excused himself to the bathroom, and when he didn't come back after a few minutes, I went to check up on him. I ended up finding him in the living room, pocketing a pack of ambien from my mom's bag. FML

#19528563
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27518) - you deserved it (3277)

On 04/25/2012 at 6:43pm - love - by anyoi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

#19528006
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25437) - you deserved it (2109)

On 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm - work - by A Henderson (man) - United States

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

#19526031
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25283) - you deserved it (3043)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my son told me he needed a haircut. I was thrilled that he actually requested it, since he normally throws a fit over getting them. He described the cut he wants. It's a mullet. FML

#19523693
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26580) - you deserved it (3138)

On 04/24/2012 at 7:59pm - kids - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States



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