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octeight

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octeight

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  • Number of visits : 29
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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octeight's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of octeight's badges

octeight's favorite FMLs

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33108) - you deserved it (3596)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42867) - you deserved it (7390)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I went to one of the United States Mints since he enjoys coins. He looked at the money and seriously said, "I have such a hard on". He did. FML

#20905869
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45073) - you deserved it (4696)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:38am - intimacy - by EconM - United States

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23116) - you deserved it (36589)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51056) - you deserved it (4865)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12998) - you deserved it (41236)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States

Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML

#14295570
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35157) - you deserved it (8715)

On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -

Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML

#7447854
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10846) - you deserved it (20695)

On 01/19/2010 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sportyhusband (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

#3055426
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13819) - you deserved it (88995)

On 06/20/2009 at 7:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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