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obnum

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obnum

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2164
  • Number of comments : 174
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 24 posted

About obnum : Some stuff about me, even though it's more than a little weird that you're checking out my profile... I have a weird sense of humor, I use sarcasm a lot, I'm a grammar nazi, and I hate stupid people. Trolls make me laugh.

The FML counter is wrong. I have 5 FMLs confirmed out of 19.

Yep, my life is pretty fucked. ;)

Seriously though, most of them were funny rather than terrible. It's what this site is for, right? Laughing at some annoyances in people's lives. I hate when I come across ones that are actually really bad for OP.

Don't message me, I never check them.

obnum's page activity

Visits<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 1:14pm<b>EmoKami</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 2:34am<b>portlandblazers</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 10:04pm<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 1:36am<b>ClaireQ123</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 8:55pm<b>sothisisreal</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 7:04pm<b>Miss_Brii</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 11:20am<b>mozilicious</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 2:30pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 11:45pm<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 5:31pm<b>empsparks02</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 1:12am<b>singer0421</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:28pm<b>Theghostlyisaiah</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 4:26pm<b>TheDvsOne</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 8:24am<b>jack_jill05</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 6:51am<b>Liamj774</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 6:58pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 6:19pm<b>jvfelicio</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 12:21am

obnum's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of obnum's badges

obnum's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

Today, I summoned up the courage to tell my crush how I've felt about her for the past two years. I really poured out my heart and soul, and she nodded and smiled throughout. Once I'd finished, she told me that she believes "sex is unnatural", and that she could never date a guy who wanted it. FML

#18488568
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29721) - you deserved it (3908)

On 12/11/2011 at 8:37pm - love - by wow (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled. FML

#18424721
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26764) - you deserved it (2383)

On 12/04/2011 at 2:04am - health - by memoryloss (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42643) - you deserved it (4948)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML

#18254256
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26897) - you deserved it (15800)

On 11/15/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by yuck - United Kingdom (Bolton)

Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML

#18222610
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27578) - you deserved it (2475)

On 11/11/2011 at 9:04pm - kids - by Username - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom learned how to use the text messaging on her smartphone. I've received 37 already, and she calls after every single one to make sure I understood her. FML

#18137674
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35414) - you deserved it (2894)

On 11/02/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML

#17659023
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12559) - you deserved it (43750)

On 09/04/2011 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Gurior (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, my aunt had to smuggle me some regular toothpaste. Why? My mom isn't letting anyone in our house use anything but "Coral Paste." There are actually lumps of coral in it. FML

#17429124
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34663) - you deserved it (2411)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:00pm - health - by teeth (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML

#17306841
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18543) - you deserved it (75176)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30719) - you deserved it (6383)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML

#16957068
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14457) - you deserved it (43469)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38851) - you deserved it (15617)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML



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