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obnum

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obnum

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1560
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 22 posted

About obnum : Some stuff about me, even though it's more than a little weird that you're checking out my profile... I have a weird sense of humor, I use sarcasm a lot, I'm a grammar nazi, and I hate stupid people. Trolls make me laugh.

The FML counter is wrong. I have 5 FMLs confirmed out of 19.

Yep, my life is pretty fucked. ;)

Seriously though, most of them were funny rather than terrible. It's what this site is for, right? Laughing at some annoyances in people's lives. I hate when I come across ones that are actually really bad for OP.

Don't message me, I never check them.

obnum's page activity

Visits<b>sammeb002</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:32am<b>BoltTheSuperdog</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:16pm<b>lb0812</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:12pm<b>sh4d0w86</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:42pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:42pm<b>isaacthedoge</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:40pm<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:55pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:40pm<b>grilledchildren</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:44pm<b>colby6666</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:21pm<b>Kreeak</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 11:46pm<b>jon06</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 6:43pm<b>curticus</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:25am<b>Alvarortor</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:51pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:37am<b>bmmondi95</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 8:40am<b>jmann8811</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 12:45am<b>ispeakspanish</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 9:48pm

obnum's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of obnum's badges

obnum's favorite FMLs

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56090) - you deserved it (8792)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a customer scream at me for ruining their child's birthday party. They had bought a Piñata from me and didn't know they had to fill it themselves. The kids had hit it open and it was empty. FML

#20809207
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48709) - you deserved it (3986)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:30am - work - by Fitz - United States

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49276) - you deserved it (8728)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I learned that the money I work hard for on YouTube has been transferred to the wrong person's banking account. That person is my ex-girlfriend. FML

#20732776
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46139) - you deserved it (6095)

On 06/18/2013 at 2:35am - money - by Broccolliboyy (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59071) - you deserved it (36942)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60730) - you deserved it (13789)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

#20692497
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55493) - you deserved it (5679)

On 05/29/2013 at 12:49am - money - by $$$ - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

#20683433
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34767) - you deserved it (41661)

On 05/24/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by obnum - United States (New York)

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML

Today, I received a note from my creepy ex, whom I broke up with two years ago, saying how much he still misses me. I live over 100 miles away from him now. The note was hand-delivered to my new address. FML

#20665723
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46214) - you deserved it (3168)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52939) - you deserved it (8601)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

#20583013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52365) - you deserved it (11853)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

#20561915
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37343) - you deserved it (17395)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:04am - health - by first time at McDonald's in months... - United States

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

#20532616
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40644) - you deserved it (3828)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm - kids - by cjw - United States



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