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obnum

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obnum

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1662
  • Number of comments : 167
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 22 posted

About obnum : Some stuff about me, even though it's more than a little weird that you're checking out my profile... I have a weird sense of humor, I use sarcasm a lot, I'm a grammar nazi, and I hate stupid people. Trolls make me laugh.

The FML counter is wrong. I have 5 FMLs confirmed out of 19.

Yep, my life is pretty fucked. ;)

Seriously though, most of them were funny rather than terrible. It's what this site is for, right? Laughing at some annoyances in people's lives. I hate when I come across ones that are actually really bad for OP.

Don't message me, I never check them.

obnum's page activity

Visits<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:34pm<b>db32</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 7:36pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 6:03pm<b>sammeb002</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 11:32am<b>BoltTheSuperdog</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:16pm<b>lb0812</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:12pm<b>sh4d0w86</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:42pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:42pm<b>isaacthedoge</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:40pm<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:55pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:40pm<b>grilledchildren</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:44pm<b>colby6666</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:21pm<b>Kreeak</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 11:46pm<b>jon06</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 6:43pm<b>curticus</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:25am<b>Alvarortor</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:51pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:37am

obnum's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of obnum's badges

obnum's favorite FMLs

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner and have to leave in shame. FML

#20899471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61415) - you deserved it (7214)

On 09/28/2013 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by :( (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54871) - you deserved it (27574)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

#20813339
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53373) - you deserved it (8503)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61144) - you deserved it (4171)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

#20810724
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56185) - you deserved it (8795)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by JustSomeGuy - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a customer scream at me for ruining their child's birthday party. They had bought a Piñata from me and didn't know they had to fill it themselves. The kids had hit it open and it was empty. FML

#20809207
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48755) - you deserved it (3989)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:30am - work - by Fitz - United States

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49346) - you deserved it (8733)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I learned that the money I work hard for on YouTube has been transferred to the wrong person's banking account. That person is my ex-girlfriend. FML

#20732776
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46200) - you deserved it (6101)

On 06/18/2013 at 2:35am - money - by Broccolliboyy (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
437 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59129) - you deserved it (36970)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60830) - you deserved it (13800)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

#20692497
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55542) - you deserved it (5681)

On 05/29/2013 at 12:49am - money - by $$$ - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

#20683433
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34795) - you deserved it (41703)

On 05/24/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by obnum - United States (New York)

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML



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