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obnum

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obnum
  • Town/Country : I'm not sure..., USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 January 1990 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1267
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 21 posted

About obnum : Some stuff about me, even though it's more than a little weird that you're checking out my profile... I have a weird sense of humor, I use sarcasm a lot, I'm a grammar nazi, and I hate stupid people. Trolls make me laugh.

The FML counter is wrong. I have 5 FMLs confirmed out of 19.

Yep, my life is pretty fucked. ;)

Seriously though, most of them were funny rather than terrible. It's what this site is for, right? Laughing at some annoyances in people's lives. I hate when I come across ones that are actually really bad for OP.

Don't message me, I never check them.

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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obnum's favorite FMLs

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17824) - you deserved it (2535)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, my college class was talking about Felix Baumgartner, who jumped from the edge of space down to earth. A boy suddenly put his head up and said in a serious tone, "I thought he jumped from the moon?" Several girls concurred. This is my generation. FML

#20121409
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21286) - you deserved it (1619)

On 10/17/2012 at 7:15pm - kids - by Mouse (woman) -

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18890) - you deserved it (8431)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

#19734660
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24661) - you deserved it (5489)

On 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by BooBabe (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

#19714828
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10762) - you deserved it (39133)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML

#19640975
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17742) - you deserved it (1623)

On 05/18/2012 at 7:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at work, I found a dead dog in a freezer. Turns out it's been in there for over 3 years. FML

#19404286
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24192) - you deserved it (1820)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:27pm - animals - by Scarred (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML

Today, I summoned up the courage to tell my crush how I've felt about her for the past two years. I really poured out my heart and soul, and she nodded and smiled throughout. Once I'd finished, she told me that she believes "sex is unnatural", and that she could never date a guy who wanted it. FML

#18488568
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27927) - you deserved it (3720)

On 12/11/2011 at 8:37pm - love - by wow (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML

#17659023
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10584) - you deserved it (39639)

On 09/04/2011 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Gurior (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML

#17306841
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15270) - you deserved it (56490)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28835) - you deserved it (6174)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37572) - you deserved it (15282)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34810) - you deserved it (30430)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)



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