oakeidoakei

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oakeidoakei

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3706
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About oakeidoakei : Word. Yo.

oakeidoakei's page activity

Visits<b>kyle8211</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 10:47am<b>foreverjordan</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 11:55pm<b>ethangoins</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:35pm<b>Marceline_17</b> - the 07/20/2012 at 11:03am<b>alaskankid907</b> - the 11/17/2011 at 2:30am<b>Magic1</b> - the 10/16/2011 at 6:49pm<b>Deloxic</b> - the 10/15/2011 at 8:03pm<b>littlesunshine</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 2:05pm<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 09/26/2011 at 10:28pm<b>BballHottie34</b> - the 09/24/2011 at 11:58am<b>Killerturtle</b> - the 09/19/2011 at 9:20am<b>WtfLoser</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 9:16pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 8:45am<b>FrecklesXO</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 10:42pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 9:09pm<b>fighterboy11</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 8:58pm<b>fakeaccountX</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 7:02pm<b>unicornofthesea</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 11:24am

oakeidoakei's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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oakeidoakei's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a violent allergic reaction to some bread I ate at a restaurant. How did they apologize? By sending me a free basket of bread. FML

by Eli / 09/19/2011 at 8:21pm / Canada (Quebec) / Health

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I caught my boyfriend of two years cheating on me. Instead of the usual excuses, he panicked and claimed he was my boyfriend's long-lost twin brother. He even tried to put on a fake accent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my younger brother decided it would be funny to put rubbing alcohol in my contact lens case while I had them soaking overnight. I didn't realize this until I put the first one in. FML

by redeye / 09/19/2011 at 1:03am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2011 at 4:17am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Love

Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML

by Mandy / 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I finally told my crush that I like her. She said she could never date me, because apparently, "My best friend likes you." Her best friend is my step-sister. FML

by messed up / 09/16/2011 at 5:10pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

by Awesome. / 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

by unknown / 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I watched a cat pounce on a small bird and rip it to shreds, feather by feather. It wouldn't have been any worse than mildly disturbing, had I not just spent the last 4 weeks nursing the bird back to health from a broken wing. FML

by Twitchy / 09/14/2011 at 7:20pm / Bahamas (New Providence) / Animals

Today, I had a lady come in to order a pizza. She wanted to use a free delivery coupon. After telling her several times that she couldn't use a free delivery coupon, unless she was having the pizza delivered, she told me I have horrible people skills. FML

by pea / 09/12/2011 at 2:32pm / United States / Work

Today, a woman came into the gas station where I work, yelling because her credit card wouldn't read at the pump. I politely told her that I could set the pump up for a set amount, and she could swipe the card at the register. Her response: "You need Jesus." FML

by charliemann_ / 09/12/2011 at 10:28am / United States (Tennessee) / Work

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving my drunk mother home when my phone rang. It was my boyfriend, so I asked her to answer the call. My mother then questioned him on our sex life and was especially interested to know if we'd used handcuffs because I "like them." I have no recollection of ever telling her this. FML

by psychicmother / 09/09/2011 at 6:58am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy